Secrets

Chapter 4- Dreams and Memories

Where am I? This isn't my usual nightmare, everything is beautiful.I suddenly realized where I was. I looked to my left, just as I remembered their was the Robbin's house. with Lucas smoking on the front porch. This was my neighborhood. my real neighborhood, the one where I was born an raised...until that day. I walked down the old street and smiled at all the memories. My friends and I playing barbies in the street while our mothers screamed at us because it was too dangerous. I laughed as I saw Mrs. Cooper smiling at me, she watered her roses and her son Jack ran around chasing another neighborhood boy who looked extremely familiar to me. What was his name? Jake? Luis? I hit me and I ran over to the little boy to hug him, but he didn't notice me. It hurt my heart. My childhood best friend couldn't see me "Mason, can you see me?" I whispered softly. But he continued to play, his bright smile made me remember the good old days of us playing outside of these very houses. 
Suddenly i saw a dog bound toward me. He was small and brown with white spots. I recognized him immediately. He was from my other life, the life where I was happy. "Max! Come here, boy!" I smiled happily, but the little dog ran literally through me and began to lick the little boy, Mason.

How can this be? I must be dreaming, but I haven't dreamed about anything except for my usual nightmare in so many years. I continued to walk until I smelled the most delicious thing ever. I looked over and saw my house. Not the house that I live in now. My old house, the house where the real me lives. I slowly walked down the stone steps leading to the small yellow house. I could see the lilac bushes peeking out from the backyard. I quickly opened the door, and a million smells hit my nose. Paint, pancakes, my mothers vanilla perfume and my brothers baby shampoo. I smiled,   could see my mom in the kitchen cooking away.

"Rebecca what do you want on your pancakes, strawberries or bananas?" I turned and saw my mother looking at me, always smiling. "bananas" I said. my mom laughed at something and said, "I know you hate bananas sweetie, strawberries it is then." I tried to tell her that she was wrong, I hate strawberries. But then I saw her. I saw...me. Becca Nesley. Same brown hair, same bright green eyes. the only difference was that the little me was smiling, I looked so young and happy. It killed me. I was laughing and playing with Alex. "Jordan! stop biting me!" I heard myself say.Why am I having a dream of this time? Never once have I had a good dream. I really don't want to leave. I watched as my mother walked over and picked up the little me. She held her in her arms and hugged her, her beautiful laugh echoing through my house. Oh God, I remember this moment. Fear filled my body please,please don't make me watch this again. I know exactly what's going to happen.It took me long enough to realize it, but I know whats going to occur in exactly 5 minutes. its as if I'm watching a movie. yup theirs him, walking down the stairs. i forgot what he looked like after all these years. Jack Nesley. the man who chases me in the nightmare I have had every night since this very day 12 years ago. Except for tonight. He was good looking I guess, tall like me with the exact same eyes. He was smiling, but I knew it was fake. This man is dangerous. Anything can set him off. 

"Hey Becca! how was your night sweetheart?" I heard him say. I saw me, the little Rebecca smile at him. she or Me I guess looked at him and  smiled at him. I want to kill him. I had to physically remind myself that this was a dream.I wanted to shout out to my mother and tell her to run, and grab Alex to take him with her. "Jack, i didn't hear you come in last night. where were you?" my mother asked. I tired to clench my eyes shut, but I felt myself staring on at the scene ahead, I couldn't look away. 
" Faith are you a lawyer now?" My father screamed at her. my mother was smart, She knew to keep quiet when he went into a rant like that. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, I knew what was going to happen. My father began to scream loudly about lack of respect or something. I saw the little Megan cower under behind my mom and she tried to ssh baby Alex's cries. My father's eyes filled with pure hate and he screamed "YOU ARE USELESS, FAITH YOU CANNOT SHUT OUR DAMN SON UP!!!"  

     Just as I remembered, my father grabbed my mom and pulled her into their bedroom. I knew what was happening inside now, but The little me didn't. The younger me put her hands against her ears and tried to ignore the violent sounds we could both here coming from their bedroom. "REBECCA DON'T GO IN THEIR!" I screamed to myself. but this was a dream, she couldn't hear me. I saw the little Becca walk over to their door and begin to open it. I screamed until my throat was red and achy and  my legs moved on their own accord. I tried as hard as i could to stay still but my legs carried me to the little me standing at my parents door. suddenly it opened, and their it was. the image that had been stained into the back of my brain since I was 6 years old. my mother lying on the floor, covered in blood.

    My father sat on the bed holding his head in his bloody hands and his head snapped up quickly. He saw the little me and she began crying. My father ran over to me and softly said. "It's okay, Sweetie. Mommy is just sleeping. Now, go get your brother and we need to leave." Becca ignored him and began to spit out "You killed her!" In between her sobs. I was forced to watch as My father grabbed the little me into the living room. He pulled a knife from the kitchen and began to cut the little me. With every cut, I could feel the old scars on my body begin to ache. I watched as my father maimed me, and my baby brother cried. All while my mother lied on the floor, slowly dying. Just like all those years ago, I was helpless. I lied down on the floor and cried. I cried for my mother, I cried for Alex, and I cried for me.