Maybe

Flash

Your life really does flash before your eyes, Yamaguchi discovered.

He saw himself as an infant, happy and pretty adorable if he said so himself.

He saw his mother's happy smile.

A thin line separated that stage of his life from the rest of it.

It was made of his mother's tears at his father's funeral.

Her sad smile that Yamaguchi wanted to be full of love and compassion like it always was.

"Where's daddy?" He cried, wailed, days on end.

The tears didn't stop there, they trickled on and on, up to those bullies, those bullies that tore at his sensitivity and exploited his weakness.

And he saw himself as a younger child, his tear stained cheeks, and he felt Tsukishima's words pierce his mind again.

"Pathetic."

Pathetic.

Perhaps he was talking about Yamaguchi. Tsukishima was never one to be nice. Maybe Yamaguchi misunderstood him. Maybe that was the beginning of hate.

But Yamaguchi loved him. Yamaguchi loved him so much he clung to his side, desperately trying to make him love him back.

But he would never.

All those years together and Yamaguchi saw it, Tsukishima's quiet demeanor. Recently he'd been avoiding Yamaguchi's touch and words more than ever. Yet every night Yamaguchi would text him 'Goodnight', still see him in his dreams. He'd still daydream about him, and allow those words to echo through his head.

Pathetic.

He really was just a heartsick idiot, wasn't he?

And he felt the air give way beneath him, and there was no panic in his chest. Instead he closed his eyes and enjoyed the fall.

And he saw the way Tsukishima was annoyed around him.

The way he kept thinking "Maybe today he'll cut if off."

Maybe this is for the best.

A/N

OOPS I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THIS STORY im an awful person haha ;-;

~Canary