my throat feels tight,
words fight their
way up but nothing
comes out, only
desperate whimpers
and quiet sighs.
these chains around my
wrists wont ease up,
theyre tight and
so is my throat and im
unable to speak and im
stuck.
i want to tell you
that i hate you,
not that i love you,
but that i hate you,
for making my ability
to speak disappear
and making the damn
chains tighter.
your hands are wrapped around
my throat, and
you ask me what's wrong.
my eyes tear up and my
throats tightens—if its
even possible— and i
blame you for
making me feel this
way.
but then i see your back,
as you walk away,
and things feel different
because i want to call
you a piece of shit
for leaving, but i so
desperately want
to tell you i need you.
its then that i realize
that it was never your hand
against my throat,
it was only my mind
playing tricks on me,
warning me to stay quiet
and pretend that i didnt
need you.
because my heart begs
for you but my mind
hates rejection.
