Isn't She Lovely | Impractical Jokers

1:00

Dylan's life really isn't all that boring; they work in a theme park in the middle of a tourist town and their employment perks allow them to do basically everything on the main strip for free. People from all over the country come to this city to pay ungodly amounts of money for things as simple as go karts, minigolf, and arcades.

This particular day wasn't all that different from any other day. Dylan's alarm woke them at 9:30 and by 10 they were dressed and out the door. By 10:30 they were clocking in at a 50s themed fast food restaurant within the theme park. Dylan worked in the kitchen and handled food but occasionally helped bussing tables out front. Their uniform consisted of an all black outfit and slip resistant shoes.

Dylan checked the position board. Apparently, they were needed as a busser today, so they pulled their cap on and skipped putting on an apron.

The day was slow until around 2 when they had their usual lunch rush that lasted about an hour. Afterwards, it was a steady stream of customers.

Dylan was refilling a napkin container on one of the tables in their section when someone addressed them.

"Excuse me," the stranger said. Dylan turned to the voice and took in the sight of the most adorable, chubby guy they'd ever seen. He had neatly styled black hair and thick-rimmed glasses offset by a patchy beard. A black tshirt and green hoodie hung perfectly on his plump body. Cargo shorts and grey Vans adorned his lower half.

"Yes?" they replied, barely a squeak.

"Where's the nearest bathroom?" he asked. Of course, the most common question ever asked in this building.

Dylan pointed toward the front entrance. "Just across here on your left," they answered automatically, as they did every time someone asked.

"Thanks." The man winked as he passed.

And then he was gone. And that was it. Dylan figured they'd never see that beautiful person ever again. For good measure, they mentally added that he's probably a huge bigot and hates puppies. Yeah. Totally not worth seeing again.

Dylan huffed and focused back on their work.

About ten minutes later, the man was back. Holy shit. Okay.

He had three other guys with him, all looking close in age but nonetheless older than him.

They went to the counter and placed their order. The three other men ordered bacon cheeseburgers and fries. Green Hoodie ordered the grilled chicken spinach salad. As they waited for their food, Dylan observed them.

The one with a receding hairline with spiky hair beyond that and a tshirt that read 'Adopt Don't Shop' talked louder than the rest and acted like a cocky eight year old. The thinnest one was almost completely bald and had beady eyes and seemed to be the punching bag of the group. The last was about the same size as Green Hoodie and wore a similar attire; black tshirt, shorts, and sneakers. He had long hair and a full beard and Dylan could hear them repeatedly compare him to a homeless person.

Their food was ready and they turned to chose a table.

Not my section, please, I just cleaned all the tables, Dylan internally begged. Oh, shit. Here they come.

The group picked the round booth in the corner, probably the only booth to fit then all comfortably. Adopt Don't Shop sat on the far left, next to him was Punching Bag, then Green Hoodie, then Homeless Guy.

Damn it, Dylan, stop staring.

Dylan went back to sweeping under the other tables of the section and tried not to overhear their conversation too much. They still managed to catch something about filming for a television show and being punished.

I've never seen them on TV, they thought first, then, I'm kinkshaming.

There was soon nothing left to do in the section, so Dylan went to the office behind the kitchen to check their phone and get a quick drink.

When they came out, the four men were still chatting, their garbage still on the table. Mostly.

Dylan noticed that in front of the three that ordered burgers had nothing but wrappers and napkins left, while Green Hoodie had the majority of his salad still in the container.

That's a nine dollar salad, what are you doing Green Hoodie? Dylan thought while making themself look busy by wiping a table.

The others continued to talk while He pushed greens and feta cheese around the black plastic tray with a fork, glaring at it forlornly. Homeless Guy seemed to whisper something to Him. He shrugged in response and put the fork down. Homeless Guy picked it back up and stabbed a piece of chicken with it and held it up to Green Hoodie's mouth.

Like an airplane.

No, don't look over here.

"Uh, Dylan?" Homeless Guy spoke from across the room.

Dylan's heart rate sped up for a moment before they remembered they were wearing a name tag.

"Yeah?" Professionalism. Still wiping the already-clean table.

Homeless Guy pointed at Green Hoodie. "Tell him he's not gonna die by eating this salad." He had a distinct New York accent. Actually, they all kinda did but Dylan was trying not to eavesdrop.

"You're not gonna die," they said plainly, looking directly into His eyes for the first time. They looked hollow.

Before Dylan could comment on that, Homeless Guy was speaking again. "Thank you," he said. "C'mon, Sal. Eat."

"I'm not hungry," Sal shrugged.

"You owe me ten dollars, asshole," Adopt Don't Shop quipped. Soon after, the four stood and threw away their garbage. They left through the side door in single file, Sal was the last.

Dylan approached him and gently tapped him on the arm.

"Are you okay?" they asked.

Sal nodded cautiosly. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"It's just that you don't seem fine, is all."

He shrugged and left with his friends.

Ok, now Dylan's probably never gonna see him again.