Shes broken

Part -22-

(a/n): this chapter is not important so if you want to skip it, feel free.

Michael went home after we were done talking; he said that he wants to give us some privacy to catch up, and that he would pick me up when we're done.

I went back in and sat on the sofa next to Jeffrey, while Arial said that she has to go somewhere, I didn't mind though.

"So, give it to me" he broke the silence.

"Give you what?" I lied, I knew exactly what he was talking about, he wanted my writing book, he wants to know my deepest feeling, and I don't know if I'm ready to open up to someone like that..

"Are you kidding me? The notebook" he replied with the don't-lie-to-me-I'm-you're-bestfriend-you-can't-fool-me expression on his face.

"Okay, but I swear if you laugh I'm going to cut your balls of ad send them in your hand for your future wife"

"Okay, okay! Chill... god!"

I grabbed my purse from the coffee table, and started to look for it. When I found it I hesitated.

"I don't hav-"

"Just give it to me" he said and stole it from my hands.

"HEY" I said in a high pitched voice.

"You promised"

That shut me up, I always keep my promises.

I looked at him as he searched in it, then I leaned in to see which one he's reading.

He started reading randomly and in no particular order:

Dd/mm/yy

You want to break me? i'm already broken.

Hurt me? Used to it.

Destroy me? You don't have that power over me.

You think you could kill me? But what if I'm already dead?

To waste your time just to make me bleed, it's not worth it.

Revenge is not worth it, you're going to waste your precious thoughts, eyes, feelings just to hate or wish someone the worst, it's not going to solve anything. It's not going o change the past that is already gone.

Just wait because karma is a BITCH!

He was reading and reading, but he had mixed emotions that I couldn't understand, his eyebrows were knitted together, maybe he was angry? Hurt? Terrified? Or guilty?

Dd/mm/yy

One unforgivable mistake

It hunts me down from day to day

Something I can never change

Something that matured me a lot, of course not by age

Less friends with everyway

More regrets hoping it would go away

Fuck it, it screwed me and I'm not okay

And everyone is waiting for my next mistake

Dd/mm/yy

I'm here

I should be happy but I'm burred

I'm still smiling but inside

Nobody could come across or understand

The secrets I keep

The memories that never happened

The smile I thought was my joy became my worst nightmare

If you think about it it's alright

But if you feel it

You can't find the words to describe

My feelings for you must be true

I can't get through it

I can't get over it

The pain you caused me

The truth you gave me

The eyes I see

I thought if I close everybody's eyes with lies

They won't see or feel

I thought about dying, but of course nobody knows why

If you look deep in my eyes

You'll see fire burning my soul, you'll see tears fighting fear.

You'll see blood, you'll see peace.

You'll see brave, you'll see weak.

You'll see far, you'll see near.

He kept reading for an hour without looking up or seeing my reaction.

After a while His hand formed into fists , his eyes turned red, he was shaking.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" he shouted, I looked at him confused, and then Leaned to read what he was talking about...

Dd/mm/yy

I saw them, I saw him, he was with her, all of our memories flashed before they were shattered into pieces, they were looking at each other, sharing stares, laughs and breath.

Their bodies were so close, their souls were one.

I felt betrayal flowing in my veins. What my eyes saw, my mind didn't understand. My heart that was waiting desperately for him to expect it, ran back to me while burning, turning into ash on the way, tears forming in its eyes, falling on the ground asking for comfort. It wanted to go home but it didn't feel right, it thought home was where he was but it thought wrong.

I didn't think of a way to get this out of my head, I knew this picture is going to stick in my head, and the pain will creep in the dark corners of my heart and hide there. It's going to hunt my nights away.

Oh no...

"it's nothing, I just watched a movie that has the same scenario so I wanted to write" I replied and flashed a smile.

"do you think I'm going to believe you? Did Michael cheat on you?"

"What? No, of course not!"

"Then what is this?"

"I told you I felt like it"

"Sure?"

"Yes"

He wasn't convinced but gave in anyway.

"If he hurt you I'll kill him"

"If he does, it'll be my pleasure. But he's not that kind of guy, I promise"

"You are my baby sister, I won't let him break your heart" he said and ruffed my hair, I smiled.

Now my heart is at ease.