C O U N T D O W N - i regret everything

what i know

Ava's POV

Everything is a haze.

My eyes won't focus on anything. I feel like I got punched in the face.

My senses are all discombobulated but I can manage to make out the voice of someone.

Trevor.

I hear him whimpering. His unsteady breath a clear indication that he had been crying. His voice gets louder and it sounds like he's pleading for someone... anyone.

My heart rate kicks up and I'm looking around, but all I see is a blurry mess, my eyes in a constant state of waking up to lighting that's too intense.

I quickly wipe at my eyes, hoping to regain vision and almost like magic everything is there, and I don't know if I want it to be.

A mere foot in front of me lies Trevor. His normally happy mood now filtered by what Bella and I saw the last time we were together.

Gut aching fear.

My eyes stay hypnotized as I watch him notice me and turn around.

The artificial light that shines from his eyes brings agony to my cracked heart.

"Hey Ava-codo." he laughs, in a choked, let's-pretend-I-wasn't-just-crying sort of way.

"Trevor, what are you doing her-" I stop mid-sentence before looking up to see one of the most beautiful sky scenes my eyes have ever seen.

It seems infinite. The pastel shades slip through the sky like water colors. A steady breeze wipes my face as I stand motionless, mouth stuck in an "o" shape as mountains littered the land around us for miles.

This was it, this is all in this moment. And whatever Trevor is going through right now sounds like such a beautifully tragic struggle.

I look down to see Trevor looking back at the landscape, something clearly heavy on his heart.

I walk up next to him and let out a long sigh.

"Hmm" he asks. I simply sit criss cross and rub his slender back, almost cringing at how little care Trevor puts forth to nourish himself. Either way, he gives me a sympathetic smile wipes at his eyes, clearing them of their wetness, leaving a pink and puffy look in them.

A subtle breeze blows as we try more than causally to avoid the topic of the tear jerker, which is kind of difficult since I don't even know what it is.

"Do you want to talk about it? It might help?"

He frowns before giving me a look of sympathy, pain visible on his face and in his words.

"It's too late for that."

I feel it crawl through my skin and into my bones, a teeth chattering shiver freezing me to the core as Trevor begins to dissolve into thin air even through the atmosphere which feels thick enough to slice.

I stop everything to comprehend what's going on, and like finding the right key in a box full of look-a-likes, I realize that I'm in the third person. Instantly, everything stretches and before I can see Trevor's beating eyes on me I'm awake.