Skinny Love

4- Numb

Eric's POV:

so here I am, wandering around the mall... man, this is BORING. Maybe I should grab another frappuccino... nah, I'm full, full of guilt. I really feel bad about spilling my drink on that girl before. Although she seemed familiar. I think I've seen her before but I dont really remember. If only I had watched where I was going, I never would've spilled my drink on her. or bumped into some random dude before. I'm as clumsy as fuck.

I sighed,

man, am i followed by bad luck or something? Who am I kidding, there's no such thing as luck! maybe there is but, i still refuse to believe it.

My feet are aching. i need to sit down. i walked towards Mcdonalds and ordered a coke float and fries. Even mcdonalds was filled with people, which clearly means... more people, less vacant seats. crap. i roamed around the place and while i was walking, a familiar face caught my sight. He was sitting down and sipping on his drink while typing on his phone. i walked towards him. he was wearing his headset and he didnt seem to notice me walking to him. I coughed to get his attention. he looked up at me, annoyed and then realization hit him. His annoyed face turned soft and a huge grin appeared on his face.

"what a suprise! Eric, mate! c'mon sit with me." he said as he stood up and pulled me into a bro hug. i smiled and sat infront of him. i munched on my first fry and sipped my float.

"Chad, How you doing mate?" I asked him. I was really happy to see one of my close friends. Chad and I are in the same class in USC. Oh yeah, i forgot to mention, I'm enrolled in the University of South California. I took up engineering and so did Chad.

"I'm good. How bout you man?" he grinned.

"I'm great" i smiled.

"good, good." he chuckled.

"Oh yeah, I'm having a party this friday. and you are so invited. you can bring anyone if you like." i invited him. i smiled hopefully at him, wanting him to come.

"sure, that'd be great! I'll bring Kristina." he said excitedly.

"Kristina?" i asked curiously.

"Oh, I forgot to introduce you two. she's my bestfriend and we live together. You'll see her at the party." he smiled.

"cant wait. she seems nice." he chuckled. I munched on my fries and finished up my float. we talk a few more minutes later. I miss him. We haven't communicated this much for a month. He's a very good friend of mine and he means a lot to me. He saved me a few times when I was in trouble. We have a lot in common so I treat him like a brother too. even though I have a twin. Yes I have a twin and his name is Jake. He's in Yale and we haven't seen each other for like half a year.

"So how's Jake?" Chad asked out of the blue.

"oh you know, same old, same old. still crazy about that car." he chuckled. remembering Jake's decision in buying a lamborgini for christmas. He really is planning on buying so he started saving last year and he ended up only saving two thousand dollars. Pity.

"HAHAHA. What a dreamer." he said.

"I know right" I chuckled.

We got into the topic about our old memories about Jake and we were having a pretty good time. I was laughing hysterically. I didnt notice the time when suddenly my Phone was ringing in my pocket.

"excuse me mate." i said, recovering from the laughter we had. He nodded and I dug my hand into my pocket to get my phone. i looked at my phone and saw Sarah's name. I swiped the screen to answer it.

"hey sar. what's up?" I said.

"What's up?! Where The Heck are you?! I've been waiting for you here in starbucks for an hour. Do you expect me to go home by myself?!" She shouted. she was so loud that I had to distance my phone a few inches from my ear. I checked the time on my watch. It was already 5pm.

"Relax sar. I'm coming. I got a bit carried away with the time. I'm with Chad." i said softly.

"Where the heck are you? do you have any plans on coming here and going home?" she said. I rolled my eyes.

"Just chill. I'm coming." I pressed the end call button and glanced at Chad who was now curious about who I was speaking to a while ago.

"My sister, Gotta take her home. It was awesome seeing you again mate after a month." he stood up as we gave each other a bro hug.

we said our goodbyes and I made my way to starbucks. as I got there I stared at my sister who was sitting down and sipping a frappe. I waited for her to notice me and when she turned to my direction, she glared at me. She stood up taking her frappe and walked towards me. She walked passed by me as if I wasn't there. I followed her, she was really pissed. We were now outside the mall, she hopped in the car slamming the door behind her. I hopped in, Started the engine and drove away. Through the drive, she didnt speak nor utter a single word. She just sits there, staring at the window looking a bit down.

"hey, sar? you okay?" her face was buried in her right palm. She looked at me and gave me a light smile.

"yeah, just thinking about something" Now I'm starting to get curious. At the mall she was mad, pissed off. now she's down, as if she just got dumped or something.

"Thinking about wh-"

"nothing, please dont ask."

I nodded and let the matter pass. The house was now in sight. Finally, I parked the car in the garage and turned off the engine. Sarah Didn't utter a single word, she just went down and ran inside. What's up with her? I'll find out later.

Kristina's POV:

"UGHHH!" i screamed as I burried my face on the pillow. life is so unfair! how could he do this to me? I trusted him with my life. I fell hard for him. I gave him everything and this is how he repays me? After everything we've been through. After thick and tough times. after the fun and memorable times. all the moments we shared, ended up to this. What a waste. I hate every moment I spent obsessing over him. I hate every moment I spent with him. I hate every moment by his side. I HATE EVERY MOMENT IN MY LIFE THAT INCLUDED HIM. That despicable human being. that idiot. that scumbag. that asshole. that son of a bitch. I hate him. But no matter how many times I say I hate him, he still lurks in my mind. A part of me wouldn't let him go that easily. A part of me still loves him. Seeing him with that girl, hurts like hell. As if a hole has been punched right through my chest. But one thing's for sure, what he did was unforgettable and unforgivable.

I feel empty, like all the life that's in my body has been drained. I feel numb. I lay there staring into the ceiling thinking about him. Somehow I feel lifeless. there was so much thoughts in my mind that I stood up and walked towards my drawer. As I opened it, I pushed away all the things in it, finding the thing that I'm looking for. Then I found it. The razor shined as the light from the lightbulb hit it.

I hurried to the bathroom and locked myself in. I squated beside the toilet bowl and dug the blade on my skin. I felt relaxed and numb at the same time. I took a deep breath as I dug it deeper on my bare skin, making it bleed non stop. It stung but I didn't really mind the pain. It was bearable. I tensed as the blade dug through my skin, making the sides of the wound, puffy and red.

i stopped and took a break. i had 5 cuts now and they were bleeding non stop. i sobbed into my arm and stood up. i washed my cuts and washed the razor. the floor was now filled with blood and i couldnt stop crying. i heard the front door open and heard Chad called my name. I just ignored his call. I sat back down beside the toilet and laid my head on the wall. i was slowly fading and then I blacked out into pure darkness.