Desire - The Joker fanfiction

Part 4

I open my eyes and a slight disappointment hits me when I realise I'm still in the same room that the Joker brought me to originally. Although I am now in the same bed and not the metal bed in that creepy room. Did he bring me in here? I don't remember anything about getting here but I do remember feeling someone caressing my cheek while being half asleep. Unless it was just a dream, it probably was.

I wonder if I'll ever get out of here...

The next few days I didn't leave this room unless I needed the toilet which happily was right next to my room. I simply sat in that bed and looked up, at the same white ceiling. Wanting nothing but to go outside again. Escape.

The Joker would occasionally come in here and check up on me but I didn't speak to him, I simply nodded if a question was asked and didn't look him in the eyes. Sometimes he got mad, other times he just got up and left the room. He was seemingly getting frustrated with me but I didn't care. I wanted out.

I honestly felt like I was going insane, sitting between these closed four walls, not feeling the fresh air or freedom for so long. It felt like I was locked up in my own asylum with no escape. And then the Joker would sometimes come to my mind and I'd wonder, why hasn't he killed me yet? And why hasn't he hurt me for the way I've been treating him? I've been ignoring him for days, I didn't move or do anything he told me to.

Maybe he feels bad? Well no that would be impossible. And the way he came into my room every single day at least once and asked those four simple words "do you need anything" sometimes followed by his addictive word "doll" or my actual name. It made me think. Surely if he didn't care he wouldn't ask me would he? But he's the joker, he can't care about anyone but himself. I don't know what to think anymore and he won't leave my mind for a second and that drives me even more insane. I just need something but I don't know what that something is.

I don't know how many days it has already been but yet again the door opens and the Joker interrupts my thoughts about him.

"Doll, I'm leaving for business again, if you need anything ask one of my goons, I'm leaving one to look after you, don't try to leave this room." He said sternly and I didn't bother looking at him. He seemed to be used to it so he left without waiting for a reply.

This is the first time he's leaving the building for business in a few days and since I've been doing absolutely nothing and I'm fully rested, this could be the perfect chance to escape. Or try to at least.

I sit back and wait for a couple of minutes to pass by to make sure he was gone.

Once it's passed, I pushed the covers off me and walked to the door attempting to open it but seeing that it was no use, it's locked from the other side. So I knock on it a few times and it opens revealing a guy looking in his mid 20s.

"Whatcha need?" He asks.

"Do you mind if I got some fresh air?" I sweetly smiled at him.

"Sorry, boss said not to let you leave this room." He replied clearly feeling bad.

"Come on please! I won't be long.." I wine leaning against the door frame. "I've been stuck in this room for days I miss the fresh air, I miss the sky, I miss human interaction.." I say and take a step closer to him putting my hands on his shoulders. "I miss the outside." I whisper getting closer to his ear. "Please?"

He seems slightly taken back by my actions and I smile feeling more confident.

"Ok fine.." He says and I jump in excitement. "But only five minutes or boss will kill me." He says sternly then smiles and I return it.

He guides me through the corridor, down the stairs and after a few turns which confused me, we were in front of two massive doors and I realised this looks more like a warehouse than a house. He pushed the big doors open and I felt the fresh air hit me as I inhaled and let it fill my lungs.

I took a few steps outside and enjoyed the air. I turned around and saw that the goon was still there watching me, making sure I wasn't gonna run. I feel sorry for him. I made sure the outside was clear and saw a road I could run to before turning around to the goon and giving him a sweet smile and turning on my heel sprinting. I only took a few steps and felt the goon grab me.

"I'm sorry but I'm not going back." I yelled trying to wiggle out of his grip which was no use so I tried kicking him from behind, missing the first time but succeeding the second time.

He groaned falling back and I continued running. After running for a couple of minutes I turned back realising he wasn't following me. Poor guy, J will kill him when he finds me gone. Oh well, we all die at one point what's the big deal?

I slow down to a fast pace walk and rub my bare arms for warmth since I was only in leggings and a t shirt. It was starting to rain and I had no idea where I was going or how to get back to my apartment.

People walking past me eyed me as if I was crazy being out like this in this weather but I didn't care, it just made me wanna hurt them all. That's funny because now I sound like the Joker. And suddenly it made me a little sad, no I didn't miss him, I couldn't. I just felt weird without his presence. Being around these normal people after I've been around a psychopath for so long felt weird and I didn't like it.

Maybe those shocks did something to me. Or maybe I just didn't realise that I felt better being around a psychotic clown than normal people.

I hate to admit this but even if the joker doesn't seem to care for me, somehow deep inside I care about him, just a little. When he came into my room all those days I didn't speak to him and asked me if I wanted anything and sometimes tried talking to me when I refused, I smile at the thought. Or when I told him the shocks didn't do anything to me because I was like this from the start, he seemed happier, I wonder why.

As much as I hate admitting this and as crazy as this sounds, I want to be around that psychotic clown. I shouldn't have left, I don't even know where I am. I should've just stayed and asked the joker to let me out.

This was such a mistake. But now that I was walking for so long I don't even know how to get back so it's useless now. It's done.

How did this even happen? Why am I desiring a psychotic clown who doesn't even see me that way? This isn't fair, I shouldn't even be thinking about this, why am I thinking about this? I can't tell if I'm crying or if it's just rain drops on my cheeks..

By this point I was freezing and my whole body was shaking as I was taking slow steps in a direction that I don't even know.

All I can do now is walk. It's all I can do.

It's been hours now... I think? I still don't recognise the area, the sun is setting and the rain is still pouring. I'm still shaking like crazy.

Cars pass me by so fast that I didn't even notice a purple Lamborghini parking in front of me and someone exiting and walking towards me, I just kept walking with my head low, lost in my own thoughts. Suddenly two hands grab my shoulders, spinning me round.

I'm still dazed till a finger lifts up my chin and I'm forced to look in those blue mesmerising eyes staring back at me. They seemed to be filled with anger for a split second before they drown in what looks like sadness but that is quickly covered with a frown.

"Didn't I tell you not to leave?" Joker growled.

"I-I'm sorry." I say my teeth chattering from the cold. "Can y-you take me back?" I ask and he seems surprised.

He sighs taking off his purple coat and is about to put it around my shoulders when something in his expression changes as if he's thought about something, then he throws the jacket at me and gets in the car waiting for me. I wrap the coat around me and get in the passenger seat.

The car ride is silent through the whole journey and quite long as I realised I must've walked pretty far.

We finally get back to the warehouse and he harshly grabs me out of the car and drags me inside, throwing me to the floor while locking the doors.

"Let's teach you a lesson shall we?" He asks as a sick smile takes over his lips.