Chaos | Steve Rogers

Chapter 10

I watched as Steve slowly walked towards the alter, carrying a coffin that was covered with the English flag, alongside five other men.

His face was emotionless but his aura said it all. When he woke up from his time in the ice he was in an entirely different world. Everything changed. Nothing was familiar. Except for Peggy. She was his one connection to home and now she was gone.

I wish I could do something. I wish I could heal emotional pain but I couldn't. I felt usless and helpless.

The choir sang softly yet their voices echoed through the church.

I zoned out as the priest started talking. I wished I drank some bourbon before coming here. At least then the alcohol would numb my powers and I wouldn't have to deal with everyone's depressing thoughts and auras. If only Tony was here. He usually carries a liquer store on him.

"And now I would like to invite Sharon Carter to come up and say a few words."

My eyes widened as I saw agent 13 a.k.a. the women who was assigned to spy on Steve, come up.

I nudged both Steve and Sam, since I was sitting between them, and gestured to look up.

Steve's eyes widened slightly with recognition and his back straightned immediately though not noticeably.

Sharon exhaled slowly and started to speak.

"Margaret Carter was known to most as the founder of SHIELD. But I just knew her as Aunt Peggy." She glanced at Steve who was still staring at her in shock before continuing. "She had a photograph in her office. Aunt Peggy standing next to J.F.K. As a kid that was pretty cool but it was a lot to live up too." She turned towards Cap locked her eyes with his. "Which is why I never told anyone we were related. I asked her once how she managed to master diplomacy and espionage in a time when no one wanted to see a women succeed at either. And she said: 'compromise when you can. But where you can't, don't. Even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. Even if the whole world is telling you to move. It is your duty to plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye and say no. You move."

And as much as I hate to admit it, her words hit closer to home than I would have liked.

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I slowly walked towards Steve, my heart weighing heavily in my chest.

"When I came out of the ice, I thought everyone I knew was gone. When I found out she was alive. I was just lucky to have her."

"She had you back too." I muttered softly.

"Do you know who signed?" He asked turning to look at me.

I nodded a grim look on my face.
"I just got off the phone with Natasha. She alongside with Tony, Rhodey, and Vision have agreed."

"And Clint?"

I shook my head. "The hawk says he's retired and Wanda still hasn't decided."

He nodded taking in the information.

"Natasha is off to Vienna for the signing of the accords."

"And you?"

I clenched my jaw. "You know where I stand on the accords."

I glanced at the picture of Peggy and couldn't help but think back on Sharon's words.

"You okay?"

I pursed my lips and shook my head.

"We're friends right? You and me?"

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion but nodded anyway.

"You must have noticed how I never mentioned my parents before?"

"I did but I didn't want to pry."

"You deserve to know the truth. Me and my parents lived in small house in a secluded area in the Montana mountains. They were reclusive and never talked to anyone. They were too afraid that somehow, someone would find out the truth about them. That they had spirit inside them. The thing is, they didn't have to worry because they didn't practise spirit. No one in my family practiced spirit and they haven't in over two centuries. When I found out I thought it was crazy. I mean we have all this power and we didn't use it. I thought it was a gift. I finally had a chance to help people, just like I'd always wanted to. So I went behind my parents back and started to practise spirit." I shook my head, smiling slightly at how I was so naive.

"I was so stupid Steve. My mother kept going on about how spirit was a curse but I ignored her. When they found out what I was doing they kicked me out of the house. By then it was too late. Spirit had become a part of me. I didn't even notice the changes until a few weeks ago. Some guy pissed me of at a bar and I was so angry that I compelled him to imagine spiders crawling all over him. And the worst part? I enjoyed it. But then I saw them. Black veins crawling up to my arm."

I pulled back my sleeve and showed him my arm. His eyes widened and a horrific look settled on his face.

"A year ago you asked me whether there were any side affects to spirit."

"You said there wasn't." He said almost accusingly.

"I lied Steve. I wanted to help people so badly. And I knew that if I told you, you wouldn't let me."

He looked as if he wanted to be mad but looked to tired to put the effort in.

"Do you know what it is?"

I nodded. "Spirit induced darkness. When I use too much spirit, it causes depression and insanity so intense that I start to experience shaking and gitters. It's why I went to visit my grandmother. I was hoping she might have had a cure."

"And did she?" He asked quietly.

I shook my head. "No she didn't. There is no cure. If I continue to use my magic then my personality will begin to distort and I will slowly die."

Steve clenched his jaw. I had a feeling he was trying to hold back his anger.

"You should have told me."

"If I did then you wouldn't have let me fight. You wouldn't have let me join the Avengers!"

"Of course I wouldn't have let you join the Avengers!" He shouted angrily. "Malia you are dying! I just lost Peggy. I can't lose you too." He whispered the last part so quitley that I almost didn't hear him.

His emotionless facade dropped and for the first time I saw how tired he was.

"Steve it's okay."

"How can you say that?! How is you dying okay?"

"Because I'm going to die fighting for what's right. I was alone for most of my life Steve and when I met you and the others I finally felt complete. I finally felt like I had a family. And you're insane if you think I'm going to let these government dickbags walk all over us."

And with that happy note, I stalked out of the church trying to reign in my anger. I didn't even have to look to know that the darkness had spread to my forearm.