August (The outfits in the Media!!)
These past two days have been..trying. I'm trying to think of a way to tell Jayla she won't be seeing her mom anymore and every scenario ends with her crying her eyes out and screaming she hates me. I was currently in the shower trying to let some of this stress go. Cat is trying to help me but I just feel like nothing is working I've been more to myself than ever.
I didn't even go to the Gala but I made Cat go even though she said she didn't want to, she had an award to receive and I wasn't gonna let her miss that so I made her go, I can't lie my wife looked absolutely beautiful in that custom made African Dashiki. I came out of my thoughts and turned off the water then got out and started getting dressed, I pulled on a black shirt a pair of grey sweats and pulled some socks on my feet. As I combed out my hair Cat came in she looked drained and annoyed so I decided not to say anything.
I honestly feel like I'm pushing my own wife away and I don't like that at all and I know she probably feels the same way but she isn't gonna say anything. I watched as she pulled a pair of dark blue leggings from the closet and a random shirt before grabbing her underwear and bra and she headed straight for the bathroom. I sighed and sat on the bed waiting for her to get out the bathroom, this gotta change it's only been a few days since Alyssa died but it's taking to much from my relationship with Cathandra.
I started looking around for my phone and remembered I left it on the bathroom sink, I opened the door quietly and the first thing I heard were soft whimpers and sniffles, I looked towards the shower and saw Cat covering her face crying. I didn't even say anything I just quickly stripped down to my boxers and got in the shower and held her.
"Stop crying baby" I said quietly, she fought against my grip but I wasn't letting go, the quiet sobs turned into loud body shaking cries as she broke apart in my arms. It hurt me to see her like this because she never really cries and I knew it was because of my actions constantly pushing her away when all she wanted was to help me.
We stayed like that for an hour and for that full hour she did not stop crying, when she finally quieted down I looked down at her and she was falling asleep, I turned off the water and picked her up bridal style carrying her into our bedroom, I dried her off with her towel and pulled on her panties a pair of sleeping shorts and a loose t-shirt on her then laid her back against the pillows and pulled the covers up over her.
I went and checked on the kids and everyone was asleep so I went and got started on dinner for everyone, starting today I gotta pull myself out this funk I'm in and get shit together I might just break the news to Nayla tomorrow about her mama but I just need time to be on my side right now. I made baked macaroni and cheese with 3 different cheeses, with some barbecue chicken, corn on the cob, collard greens and mashed potatoes, I don't know what got into me cooking like this but I didn't mind.
After I was done cooking I went upstairs to check on the kids but none of them were in their rooms not even Elijah so I went to Cats room and everyone was on the bed sleeping cuddled up on her Elijah was laying across her chest and rest of the kids were scattered on either side of her. I woke up AJ, Nayla and Zoey and told them to go ahead and wash up for dinner then took up Elijah from Cats chest and held him as I sat next to her.
"Babe....Cat...Cathandra I know you not sleeping so hard wake up and come eat this food before your kids get away with it" I said shaking her.
"Mmmmm! August what the hell" she said sitting up rubbing her eyes.
"I made dinner you want something to eat?" I said bouncing Elijah in my arms.
"No" she said rolling over to go back to sleep.
