Love from hell (Raura)

Save me if...

I can't drown my demons... They know how to swim.

As a half demon,my heart is a battlefield. It's a war between my soul and the demon that's trying to consume it. Is there really any hope left for me? I've been cursed so long ago... Even if I find a way to escape. What is there left for me?

Everyone that I ever loved is dead. What's even the point? Oddly enough... While I was with Angel I didn't notice how fast time was passing by. I didn't realize that everyone I was once attached to... Just vanished as if they have never been there.

"What's troubling you,Ross?"
Asked Laura waking me up from my daze.

"Nothing... I was just thinking... Why are you trying to help me?"

"Where did that come from?"
She raised one of her eyebrows.

"Well... I just don't get why you'd do anything."

"I don't understand what you're implying,Ross."

"You just... Remind me of myself back then."

"Really? How so?"

"Well until the day I left for that damned trip,I was willing to help anyone,to become a hero. I thought I could overcome anything. I believed everything was just perfect. That it couldn't get better,that I was living my life to the fullest. But then... The minute I walked into that car, something changed. I felt useless. A weakling. Like a puppet. I had no purpose. I think that thought consumed me and that's how I actually got in this situation in the first place."

"Ummm... Ross..."

"I was filled with hatred. I hated myself and this world. I hated everyone because I was born. It was just hate. Mist,a crash and before I knew it, I ended up in a dark place... I was crying. I am sure of it. I was scared. Of loneliness,of darkness. And then a voice... It could grant me one wish in exchange for something. I didn't think. I just said I wanted to live. At that moment my life seemed so precious. I remembered the days when I didn't need a reason. I wanted them to come back. I needed them. But they were long gone and so was that me who made that stupid wish. I ended up with this demon who's messing with my mind,who's trying to "free"me from my pain."

"Ross!"

"I hate them! I hate them all! I hate myself and everything that's around me!"
I screamed and before I knew it my eyes were bleeding. I knew I was suffering. It  knew I was still suffering,I was still weak.

"What are you doing?!"
Laura yelled.

"Stand back or I'll slay you"

I watched her trembling in fear. I was scared myself. There was no one to purify this demonic aura. Once again we ended up alone in the middle of nowhere. What should I do? What can I do? Damn it!

I could only imagine the way I looked to her. Claws,fangs, red eyes and the scars from the past when I found myself in front of the gates that were leading to hell. I was lured there. By who? How? And why am I remembering this now? Does the demon intend to take over my body?

"Your eyes are bleeding. What's wrong with you?"
Laura took a step closer to me.

"Stand back! There's no telling what I might do next."

"What's going on ?! Just tell me already! How the hell am I supposed to help you if you don't tell me anything?"

"I don't really know it myself!"

It was not an ordinary crash. I didn't run over a man. No... It had horns and a tail. It was smirking. His eyes were red and he was looking straight at me. I shouted. I gave in to his words. I saw her face then. She-she was crying. Why? Who is she?

One more minute and I would've given in probably. But lucky me, Laura grabbed my arm and brought me back to reality. But...was that a memory? I don't know anything anymore. What was my life like?

"Tell me. How did it feel?"
Laura questioned me as she helped me sit down.

"What?"

"Well I don't know if you know it,but you were transforming."

"What?! Into what?"

"In a demon I believe. Your nails have turned into claws and your years have grown sharper. Not to mention that your eyes were red and I think I even saw a tail."

"That was happening to me? I felt as if my body was going numb. In fact,I still feel as rather fatigued, as if I had ran an entire marathon. I suppose the demon tried to get rid of my human soul."

"But why now?"

"Perhaps because I was lost in thought and I wasn't focused on trying to keep him in anymore."

"Wait. So you're always fighting with the demon within you?"

"Yes. That's the price I have to pay in order to keep my consciousness. If I lose this battle, I'll most likely die and the demon will capture my soul, send it to hell AND take over my body. I can not let that happen. Laura... Would you do me a favor?"

"Sure. Just name it."
She gave me a weak smile.

"If it ever happens again,do everything in your power to wake me up. "

"I give you my word."

"I'd also ask you to continue to search for Angel. But I remembered that you owe her one anyways."
I smiled at her in return.

Save me if I become my demons...

Hiiiii! Please don't hate me! I know I said july and it' s september but a lot of stuff have been going on this summer and I barely had time to do anything for me, never mind getting bored. I promise I'll try to make it up to you. Also... I hope that you already realised that this book is mostly about Ross' thoughts and his feelings. There will also be a little bit of action, but it's mostly is about how Ross sees this journey and about the demon inside of him.