Nicomaki- into you

Finally.. Finally, i said it!- 04

||RINS POV||

At night, I could never sleep. I would just stare at the ceiling. I miss kiyo chin.. I miss our great friendship. I really like her. I want her to be my girlfriend! She's beautiful... I've felt so bad, knowing she'll never want me! It's hurts you know!

I want her to like me! I get why she wouldn't wanna be my girlfriend, we both girls! It's weird! It's the first time I've ever came out. I hate myself! I hate myself for liking kiyo chin! If I never would've liked her, we would still be best friends!

But now.. But now.. I'm too afraid to even talk to her! Maki made me happy. She's amazing. But, I already know she likes Nico. Well, at least I feel like she does. And I feel like I'm stopping her from getting with her. I do like maki though... I just don't think I'm right for her.

I'm just in such a weird situation. I don't know what I'm even doing. I feel like whatever I do, or say, is wrong. I feel like disappearing. I know I shouldn't say that.. But I really do feel like it! So much has just been confusing me! Why do I like her!? Why do I like Hanayo! I'm suppose to like boys! I feel like I'm.. Different.

I know there's a lot of girls that like girls too, but for me, it feels weird. My past self wouldn't see me being like this. I'm scared people will judge me. What if everyone at school makes fun of me? What if my parents get disappointed? I just feel like all these bad things are gonna happen.. I want my kiyo chin back..

||HANAYOS POV||

I know. I know kiyo chin is in a difficult state. I know Rin, and I know when she's sad. Because I'm so close to her.. I don't know what happened. When she told me she 'like liked' me, I panicked. Rin is my friends, not my girlfriend.. I feel like a terrible person.

All I wanna do right now.. Is hug her. I wanna feel that feeing. That great, amazing feeling when she hugs me. When she hugs me, it makes me feel like all my worries are just.. Gone! It's just that, my parents would never let me date a girl. I did want to though. To admit it, I really did! But.. I don't think it's something I can do.

I made a big decision. I went over to Rin's house. I knocked on the door, and Rin opened it.

'Do you.. Wanna go to the beach with me? I really wanna talk...' I said to her.
'O-okay...'

We walked over to the beach. It was right next to Rin's house.

'So... What do you wanna tell me?...'
'I'm sorry.'
'Wh-wha..'
'I'm sorry for acting selfish. I feel like a bad person..'
'Kiyo chin...'
'Rin! I'm so sorry! I-.. I'm so sorry!'
At this point, I was in tears. I couldn't keep them in. I always wanna act brave in front of Rin. But this time.. I just couldn't.. I was just a big mess.

'I love you Rin! I just didn't tell you, or acted like I did, just so my parents wouldn't think of me as a different person! I was so stupid! I don't care anymore though.. They can think wherever they want..'
'K-Kiyo chin..'
'Rin chan!'
I ran over to her and hugged her. We were both in tears. I'm so glad I got that out though.
'Hanayo! I-I love you too..'