After half an hour of sobbing and asking for forgiveness from God, I realized something. If Father sacrificed his own life for me, then I must not make it into a waste! I will change my life already! I will become a saint like him! Just like what Jesus did to me, it is such a pity how many people waste the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross and stray from His true church: The Catholic Church.
Everything went to a blur,
I imagined people who are gossiping about others;
People being selfish and greedy;
People not caring for other people;
Men who are slaves of the flesh, that which degrade the dignity of women just for pleasure;
People who would do everything just for fame and glory;
People who thought that they were better than anyone else;
And especially, people who forgot God just because He seems silent to them, and I for one thing, am the best example for that. I prayed for them all. After all, they- no, rather we are the reasons Jesus suffered so much.
I prayed for the first time in 10 years, I have not said any prayer since I was 20 years old. I prayed:
"God, I thank you for the sacrifice my Father did and most especially the sacrifice
You have made on the cross for me. I promise and vow that I will never again stray from
Your side forever. Thank you for this dark winter night, for I have learned
very much from it than all my whole lifetime. I now realize that I must not be anxious
if I have challenges and difficulties, because after the dark winter night of the soul there shall be
it's bright spring day. Amen."
I tucked myself into bed after, I have never felt so comfortable before. I could not wait to tell my wife and whole family of what I have known about my father, I could have never been more excited to call Fr. Bernstein as my Grandfather or to treat Mr. Dominic as my new uncle.
I thank God for this night and for my Father. He has been more good to me than I have deserved, but as for now I will sleep. Anxiously but patiently, for I know surely that after the Dark Winter Night will come the dawn of our Savior. Amen.
YOU ARE READING
A Dark Winter Night
SpiritualWhat would you do if you were stuck in a motionless and miserable reality where no matter how hard you tried to escape, you always seem to end up in misery? You would feel helpless, right? Well, Edward felt more than helpless. Edward Anderson, a har...
