Among The Stars ★ Phan

Five

~Timeskip to the weekend~

Phil

I couldn't sleep. I hadn't seen Dan in a couple days, and I've been sinking back into my old self. The lonely, insecure, miserable person I used to be. I couldn't help but feel as though the two were correlated.

I looked at my phone sitting across the room. I could text him. I totally could. It would be so easy.

You texted him first last time, Phil, don't do it.

Who cares? Nobody notices any of that except you.

Just don't. If he wants to talk to you then he will.

But why wouldn't he want to talk to me?

I thought back to what had happened the other day, when we had skipped school at my house. It wasn't a big deal, really, but it was a little weird.

We were both staring straight at the screen, eyes on the tv while Light and L had their usual battle of wits. It was episode 12, we'd been watching for hours.

Suddenly I felt Dan's fingers move, twitching next to mine. I inched my own forward, and curled my index finger around his. My heart sped up as the rest of our fingers curled to match. His calloused palm met my smooth one, the heat of his blood flow next to mine intoxicating.

Eventually Dan had to go, and I was left with just my own hand laying next to me, the heat from Dan's fading.

We hadn't spoken since then. I missed him.

I looked out the window, the sun's rays beaming through. I sighed, and closed the curtains. The sun wasn't fitting for my current emotions.

~

I woke to a chilly breeze blowing over me. I had fallen asleep and left the window open. Smart, real smart. I went to close it, and paused. I checked the time. 1:27 am. The night air looked inviting. I slipped on some sneakers and a jacket, and walked out the front door.

The night light washed over me, and I breathed in the crisp air. My boots crunched over fallen leaves, chilled with fall frost. My breath puffed out in clouds.

I walked down the middle of the street, admiring the calm atmosphere. No cars, or people, or intrusions of any kind. The stars spread out in the sky, surrounding the moon's orb. I continued walking, admiring the silver tint the damp leaves gave off in the moonlight.

I wonder what Dan was doing right now. Or my parents. Or my brother. Was anyone thinking of me? I shook my head. "Probably not," I mumbled to myself. Dan was preoccupied. My parents had business to focus on. And my brother was living the college dream life, always telling me over the phone about the insane parties and nightlife.

I was utterly alone.

Soon I saw a bus bench, and a hooded figure sitting on it. And then I figured, why the hell not? So I approached the figure, and said, "I think the busses closed down hours ago." The figure looked up, tears streaming down their familiar pale face. "Dan?" He didn't say anything. He just waved. I didn't say anything else either, and just sat down next to him and clasped his hand in mine.

Dan

I couldn't take my parents anymore. I couldn't stand it, they have turned to abuse. They hit me and and hurt me and i just can't stand it anymore. It's not my fault adrian died, he the one who did it, i didn't kill him. I'm lying in my bed and i remember the pills in my bathroom drawer. I shake my head,' i couldn't do that to Phil', i thought i my head. I look at my clock and its 1:12, i get out of bed and and sneak out of the house. Remembering when Adrian and I would would sneak out and have a midnight walk.