Taehyung felt his eyes open.
He couldn't stay asleep.
He sat up slowly and put a hand to his forehead, feeling slightly dizzy from the pounding in his head. He took a deep breath and clenched his jaw.
Taehyung suddenly felt a stinging pain behind his head. He groaned and pulled his arm back to touch the wound, then he felt something wet on his fingers.
Blood.
The moonlight shining through his window lit up the liquid on his fingers. He sulked at the darkness as the memories washed over him, one by one.
Taehyung started shaking and clenched his hands into fists. He could barely hold in the pain, let alone his cries. He felt it every time he woke up. Every time he would look at the clock and see that it was still too early in the morning. Every time he would forget why he would wake up. Every single damn time he would remember after touching his pounding head. He was tired of it.
How could have Yoongi been so selfish.
He left his mom to suffer with his stepdad. He had left his classmates filled with regret because they never talked to him. He left Taehyung alone, not even leaving a note. He could have asked for help, it always gets better. Medicine could have fixed it, could have kept him alive in the world he hated. He left the life he was given to fulfill his own happiness.
What a selfish... prick.
Taehyung's anger suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a melancholic feeling. His heart throbbed with pain. He screamed and cried into his pillow, wanting to drown his feelings and himself as well. He hated feeling like this. He could've done something. He could've and never did. He let Yoongi go like water through his fingers. He knew and didn't take it as serious. All he did was shrug it off it the end.
Taehyung regretted everything.
If he had never talked to Yoongi or forced Yoongi to talk... he could still be alive.
Taehyung would still be able to see his smile, even if most of the time it was forced.
He blamed it on himself.
It was his fault.
All of it.
