Chapter 38: Too Late to Apologize

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I woke up with a throbbing headache. It pounded in my head, almost syncing with the beating of my heart. I sat up slowly, careful not to make my head spin any more than it already was. I blinked a few times, adjusting to the light before I realized that I was still at Laura's house.

I was lying in her bed and next to me, was Laura, but her head was where my feet were and visa-versa. 

"Look who's finally awake," she says. I stare at her, not having a clue what she's talking about. Also not sure why she's so happy and cheery this morning. "Don't worry I had Jenny tell your mum that you fell asleep here."

 "Thanks," I say. I hadn't even thought about that. "What happened?"

I try to think back to last night. It slowly comes back to me...all of it, even though I'm almost hoping it won't. All the things Scorpius said, all the things I said, and what happened with that bloke. It all comes rushing back.

Laura gawks at me. "You better remember because I don't want to have to tell you what I saw happen."

"Shit," I mutter. "I think I know, but shit I hate myself."

"Rose-"

"No!" I panic. I sit up, pulling the covers off of me and scooting out of bed. I stand up, but when I do, my stomach turns over and I try to cover my mouth as if that will stop me from throwing up.

"Bathroom!" Laura points towards the door and I run in the direction of the loo to puke. Laura follows me in. She waits by the sink for me to finish. When I do, I look up at her hopefully.

"I think I did something really bad," I wince. "I'm a horrible person."

"You're not a horrible person." She reassures me. I see her wetting a cloth in the sink, which she hands to me. I use it to wipe my face. "You're a good person who made a horrible mistake. There's a huge difference."

I appreciated her saying that, but I didn't really believe it. I did make a horrible mistake and for that, I'm a horrible person.

 I start crying when I think about Scorpius. It hasn't even been twenty-four hours and I miss him like crazy. I'd rather be fighting with him, than not be with him at all. I miss his eyes and his smile, the way his cheeks dimple, just a bit when he grins. I miss his voice and the compliments he would give me, just for no reason at all. 

I sob into the cloth. "Oh Merlin, what did I do?"

Laura kneels down next to me on the floor and places a hand on my back, patting gently. "It's okay Rose, you can figure this out."

"No, I can't!" I exclaim. "No one just figures this out. He's going to hate me forever, I can't just fix that."

"Yes you can, you love him."

"I cheated on him!" Saying those words makes me shiver with disgust. I get flashbacks of that bloke, the one whose name I don't even know. The one I kissed. The one I did more than just kiss within a bathroom. "When did I become a slut? Because that's what I am, a fucking slut!"

Laura smiles at me, while I'm crying. What's so funny? "Rose, I know you're really hungover right now, but you're not a slut, okay? You just need to sort this out. You love Scorpius, and he loves you, that's really all that matters."

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