princess <3 tracob au

1 ~ Away from my past

Troye 🎀

I nervously pushed the doors open, walking into the big building full of people. It didn't matter which way i looked at, there was people anyways. A lot. It was so crowded. My hands were shaking so much that the piece of paper fell out of my hands. I gulped and quickly picked it up. The paper said which way i had to go, but it wasn't making any sense. I was so stressed. Did i need to go to my class already or go to the director? I had no idea.

Everyone was staring at me. I was used to it, you don't see a boy with girly clothes and a wig everyday. But i didn't care. Sometimes. At least my family accepts me. My father still had a little trouble with it but hopefully he will get used to it.

I hated this. I didn't even wanna be here, but i had to. I changed from school because i was getting bullied a lot. I think i got bullied mostly because they saw me change. The first 2 years i was still the curly brown haired boy, who acted like he was straight. But that ain't me. I became myself. And i'm happy with that person. Again, sometimes.

When i get bullied i always began to think bad about myself. Am i really a.. What's the word.. Fagg? Faggot? Am i really a faggot? Is it wrong that i'm gay? Is it wrong that i like looking like a girl sometimes? People always told me i was a disgusting transgender. But i wasn't a transgender. I was just a boy, not caring about gender roles. But again, was that even a good thing? I wonder how heaven is when i die. People say you go to hell if you're gay. The thought of that always made me scared, i was very sensitive. I felt like crying again, but it wasn't the right timing. I just needed to find out which way i had to go.

'Hey look at the new guy'

'Guy? You sure that's a guy?'

'Kinda looks like a girl'

'Then why is he wearing a fucking wig?'

People kept talking about me, it kept going. I felt horrible already. I begged my parents to be home schooled but they didn't let me. This was the right choice, they said. Though i didn't agree with them i couldn't do much about it.

'Guys shut the fuck up, he can wear what he wants.' A voice suddenly said, making my heart suddenly very happy. I didn't want to turn around to see who it was. I just kept walking.

I thought i was going the right way, but then a girl came up to me. I think that was the girl who told the other one's to shut up. Her voice sounded the same, as she talked to me. 'Hey! Uhmm, are you new here? I think you're going the wrong way.'

'Y-yeah.' I said, already stuttering. Fuck, why did i stutter? I always stutter. I'm so stupid.

'Don't worry, i'll help you. Can i see your schedule?' I nodded and gave her the piece of paper.

'We're in the same class, we can walk together if you want.' She smiled at me. I nodded and gave her a small smile back. She was really sweet and pretty.

While we walked to our class she introduced herself. 'I'm Alexis by the way.'

'I'm Troye.' I said, being very proud of myself for not stuttering. I spoke to her, normally. Without whispering, without being scared. That felt great. I think i trust her.

'Nice to meet you Troye, are you a little excited to meet your classmates?'

'I don't know.. Are they sweet?'