Moments

Birthday 2015

The entire house except the sloths in the double bed next to me woke up by about 10 this morning. Those two: we had to bounce the bed to wake them up. Me and the rest of Little Mix thought we'd all get up to go over before lunch, something Zayn and Perrie agreed on not being too happy with. Of course, they have their ways to blackmail Zayn: remember the nail polish? They used that.

"Happy birthday, Lou!"

"Boobear's getting old now," Harry grumbled.

"He's getting old, but he's not growing up at all."

"Niall's not either."

"I don't think Zayn is."

"I can tell you Louis isn't anywhere near sensible. Sometimes I wonder if my boyfriend is really just a 5 year old boy."

"See, that's one of the things you don't ever think about with Liam, even in his Batman and Toy Story phase."

"Like you're any better."

"Well I can't help it that everything Niall does makes the both of us look stupid."

"Hey! That's not nice."

"I haven't even gotten to my Irish jokes." Paul roared in dissent. Zayn cracked up laughing as one simply does when you mention Irish jokes. My boyfriend looked at me in horror. "What? I did have a life before all this!" They aren't particularly offensive in my opinion, but that's like him telling me he knows a lot of Asian jokes. Not that I would mind too much. "I tell Chinese jokes too!"

"Bring it on," Paul roared.

"I've forgotten who I've told this joke to, but the joke goes that there was this Chinese kid at a European friend's party, ay? And it's her turn to pin the tail to the donkey and the friend's mother hands her a shoelace for a blindfold," I say matter-of-factly. Paul was probably the loudest there as I finished the joke. "Anyway, I say we revisit Louis' most impressive moments for the fun of it." I look around. "Paul, you get the most trouble, you start."

"Oh, man, mine's the longest. Niall, I t'ink you had somet'in' to say." The boy next to me cleared his voice, scratched his hair and cleared his voice some more before finally speaking.

"Yes, well, you see this beautiful girl? She's my girlfriend." He holds my hand tightly in his as I notice the children softly whisper among themselves. "And Louis let me ask her out."

"You'd have to be good to pass the test."

"Two," I correct him. "There's no real point passing his test if I don't like you in the first place." Ooh, goes everyone.

"Which really doesn't happen often, by the way."

"So... tell me, Annabelle, how many boys have you kissed before Niall?"

"Before Niall... Gorlog's potatoes, none. Never really had any luck in that department until now."

"Well Niall, you did a good job of it."

"These three did a good job stinking up the room last night, that's what."

''See, I can't smell anything. So I'm all good."

"But you're just disgusting! I can't even get you to roll down the window for a minute!" Eh, don't need to know about this one.

"Food's done!"

Lunch involved a bit of alcohol, not that I consumed any. But Zayn and Niall took a strong liking to it and later, when I was just in the living room playing with the kids, they pass out drunk, head to the table. We just laughed, Perrie and I. They'll sober up in time for dinner then pass out drunk again. 5 quid bet against Louis that, on top of that he'll get drunk. "So we're betting 5 quid I'll get drunk?"

"Pretty much."

"5 each?"

"Yeah."

"Just gonna wait for 10 quid extra birthday money then."

My friend paid out 10 quid in bets on his birthday.