Lust | Kian Lawley

Chapter 4

Its Monday, everyone hates Monday's. I haven't heard from Kian since Friday, kinda wish he would have cheated and texted me but then again who knows what he'll do for a phone number,it kinda excites me in a way.

Rose's Pov

4th period. Ugh.
I was sitting in class writing the notes down on the board and someone sat next to me. I look up and to no surprise it's Kian.
"I didn't know I had you in this class," I said confusingly.
"That's cause your always in the front and paying attention," he says with a chuckle
"Well success is key🔑," I say.
"True," he says.
"You say true but then again still don't pay attention," I say laughing.
"I do to!"
"But only when I have to," he added.
"You always have to pay attention in class dumbass," I say laughing.
"Ok whatever let's move on," he says.
"I see you still haven't cheated to get my number," I say looking at him.
"Well I thought about it but then I didn't want to risk anything so I decided not to, even though it was killing me not to talk to you all weekend," he says smiling at me.
I didn't know I was staring deep into his brown eyes, I hate staring at people and/or anyone in the eyes it makes me feel uncomfortable or insecure when they stare at me back in the eye, but I couldn't look away I was so focused.
"What,?" He asks.
"I didn't say anything," I tell him.
"Your staring," he says.
I just rolled my eyes and looked away and back at the teacher.
"Wow somebody's mood changed quickly," he said.
Why am I even talking to this guy? I know the things he has done and his intentions maybe he only wants one thing like every other guy..

The bell rang for 5th period which is lunch. I was walking to my locker, putting my books away. Kian's tall figure next to me.
"Rose?" He said.
I love the way he says my name.
"Hmm," I hummed.
"Is everything alright, did I do something?" He asked.
"No," I answered not looking at him.
"Looks like I did, you won't even look at me," he said.
"Do you think you did something wrong?" I snapped.
Why was I so moody? Maybe the fact that I'm so frustrated, what does he want?
"Woah I'm sorry, no I don't think I did but you know girls they always think guys do something wrong or are very sensitive," he snaps back.
"That's not the case," I say finally looking at him
"Not every girl is like that, as a matter of fact that's kind of an asshole thing to say," I added.
We're not even together and are already arguing, great...
"I still don't understand what I have done wrong," he says getting angry.
"I'm just so frustrated!" I raised my voice a little.
It was only us in the hallway, we argued to long,  every body is already in lunch or in class.
"Frustrated about what, for all I know your the one making me frustrated," he says.
It came out like word vomit, it was annoying me so much, I said to much.
"Are you just gonna use me like every other one of your hoes, just want me for one thing? Hurt me? Cause if that's your intentions I don't want to be apart of it," I raise my voice.
He looked angry and upset, like if you just took a kids toy away. Maybe that's what he was gonna make me. His toy.
"Your wrong, maybe I actually saw you as someone so much more. Different. Not like one of my hoes, whatever that's supposed to mean. I don't know why you thought that way right away.. Whatever you've been through rose, don't let it affect you so much to the point where you start to push people away," he says.
"I'm not pushing you away, we were never close," I say.
"That's right, you never gave me a chance and that's my point, you push people away before it gets to serious," he says.
Why did he have to be so right? He reads minds now. He looks at me one last time then turns around and walks the opposite direction of the cafeteria. So all I could see was his back, it was like a dramatic moment like in a movie.
All I could feel was guilt for being so mean, I've never felt like this for a guy, the guilt. Or wrong. He's right though, that's why I've been built such a strong person, because I push people away when I know they'll just hurt me. Like a gut feeling.

It was 8th period the last period of the day. I haven't seen Kian all day after that incident.
"Hey rose," I heard behind me.
I recognize that voice from anywhere.
"Omg Jacob!" I yell excitingly. 
Jacobs an old friend since 1st grade, he moved schools when we were starting freshman year. I had this huge crush on him but never told him because of our friendship.
"What are you doing here?" I asked him.
"Just visiting, no I'm kidding what I would be doing here," he answered laughing.
"Wait your transferring back?" I ask him excited for his answer.
"Yup," he says smiling.
We were all catching up with him since we were all friends with him back then.
We were outside because school has ended. Jc was asking Jacob some weird questions, so I started looking around. I seen Kian on the hood of his Range Rover. Not by himself but with Melanie. Shook. I don't know why he goes so low just to get a hook up, literally any girl at this school would have sex with him. Not that I would...
Now there making out. I wasn't sad but instead I was angry. Angry because we literally just argued three hours ago. I mean we didn't have anything serious, I just thought it was something more because we were feeling each other. I knew he would do this, it's no surprise. This is why I pushed him away. Because I knew he would get bored because I won't do anything with him, then go running back to Melanie.

Kian's Pov
I don't understand her. What did I do. My reputation is what ruined this. She thought I would get bored of her. Only if she knew I was the guy at the Dominic's party. Things would be different.
The only reason I'm with Melanie right now is because I know it would bug her.
"Let's go back to my house, I'm house sitting today and my parents aren't home," Melanie says rubbing her hands on my chest.
"Mm that's not a good idea, I'm busy," I say taking her hands and putting them by her sides.
"I'm sure you can cancel whatever you have," she says taking my hands In hers.
"No I can't it's important," I say getting of my car and her letting go of my hands.
I hooked up with her once and I feel terrible about cause it happened after I kissed rose. Her kisses were in comparison to no one, they were very rare and passionate which is unusual nowadays. The more I thought about her the more angrier I got.