Ms. Masochist

III

Contentment is the key to life. No one will ever really find true happiness so being content was just enough. Beyonce walked down the hall to her office, thinking of how humdrum her life had become. At first it calmed her but now, it's getting dull. The only thing that consoles her is what her aunt had taught her.

"Contentment is key," Sade would say to her whenever they had deep and intimate conversations.

Beyonce knew that life wasn't roses and sunshine. The cold truth was that you will experience hurt. Some experience hurt almost everyday of their life. True happiness can not be found in a world that is so cold. What happened to natural love and affection for one another? There was once a time that people truly cared for one another but now, everything is dog eat dog. We are all like crabs, trying to pull each other down.

So Beyonce chose to be content. Content with life, content with the past, and content with her current situation. When she settled in her office chair she looked at her schedule. Due to studying Mr. Carter, many of her appointments had been given to another psychiatrist for a short period of time. She just hoped that who had them did a good job. Some of her patients were so codependent. They would call her at various times of the night to just vent.

"Hello Dr. Knowles," she heard a now familiar voice say.

It was Mr. Shawn Carter. She noticed how today he walked in with a smirk on his face. His usually dark eyes were lighter and brighter. He sat down and made his self comfortable in the chair. They were still just in the beginning of their sessions so she hadn't dug as deep as she planned to yet. All she knew was the basics but she wanted, no needed, to know Mr. Carter.

"You look very beautiful today Dr. Knowles,"

Her whole facial expression changed and her cheeks reddened. She tried so hard to hide it but her efforts were futile. He smiled, noting how easy it was to make her blush.

"She must not have anyone to compliment her," he thought.

"Thanks Mr. Carter. Now let's get straight to business. Today I would like to delve further into your life. I want to truly get to know you Mr. Carter,"

"Nah, you don't want to know me,"

She frowned, hating how he just wouldn't go along and make this easier on the both of them.

"And why wouldn't I?"

"You seem like a good person. To know me, you must learn to understand me and to understand me would change you. You'd start to see things from my perspective and once you've gotten yourself into that there is no going back. I'm a dark person Ms. Knowles. Way darker than what my case files may say. If I were you I'd just drop me right now and give up. There is no changing me,"

His words shocked her and caused her to begin to question even doing this. His last doctor quit and never would tell why. He must really be some type of sociopath. Heartless, without a care in the world, not even truly caring for himself.

"You don't know me Mr. Carter. I know people as dark as you which is why I joined this field," she replied coolly.

Now she made him begin to question her. Who could possibly be darker than him and not behind bars already. Or was she just bluffing? He looked into her eyes and she returned the stare, making sure to never avert her eyes. She couldn't show him her weaknesses. Shawn was the one who ended the stare off. He finally realized he might be dealing with his match, or someone who will soon become it.

"Well let's begin Mr. Carter,"

"Call me Shawn," beyonce cleared her throat and relaxed her body a bit.