Through Smoke and Ashes

Four||Disapearing Act

The decision was final. I followed Ahren blindly out of the office and through the corridors toward a room where I would spend the night before leaving in the morning. Though I held back tears, my emotions clamored for release.  

We ascended a staircase, barely noticing the floating lanterns around us. I glanced at them, briefly curious about their presence.  

Ahren caught my look and turned to me. "Riders aren't the only ones here; we also have witches. They primarily assist with medical needs but have other roles too," he explained, gesturing toward the floating lights.  

We continued ascending, easily passing the initial levels. By then, my eyes had adjusted to the dim light, revealing that most floors looked similar.  

At the top, we reached a square room furnished with a few couches and a fireplace, books scattered throughout. Large hallways filled with closed doors flanked either side, and a balcony faced the staircase.

"This area is dedicated to the living quarters of the school," he said, turning toward the hallway on the right. "You'll find the cafeteria, library, ballroom, and classrooms on the floors below." His words trailed off, and I saw a flicker of something, regret, perhaps, pass through his eyes. He'd said these words a hundred times before, but now they seemed like an afterthought. Even though he had likely rehearsed this, it felt irrelevant as I wouldn't be around to experience any of it. 

He paused at a door, unlocked it, and pushed it open. "You'll have your own room for the night. The morning bell will wake you," Ahren said softly, offering one last smile, though it didn't reach his eyes. "I'll come to get you in the morning, and then we'll head to your village."

I nodded but said nothing, too exhausted to protest. I stepped inside, the soft creak of the door closing behind me echoing louder than I expected. The room was sparsely furnished, a bed with a thick quilt taking up most of the space, a small window letting in a dim sliver of moonlight. The cold stone walls pressed in, making the space feel even smaller than it was.

After a long moment of silence, I finally sank onto the bed, pulling the quilt around me for warmth. My thoughts, however, refused to settle. I lay there, staring at the ceiling, torn between exhaustion and the weight of everything I'd learned. Ahren's words, my place here, and the undeniable sense that something was deeply wrong swirled in my mind. I couldn't stop thinking about the society that had brought me here—the council that had promised me a future as a rider, only to take it away because of something as trivial as my gender. The injustice felt sharp, a raw wound open for the crows to pick at.

I clenched my fists beneath the quilt. If I were male, none of this would have happened. I would be training tomorrow, just like the others. But instead, I was being sent home, an embarrassment in the eyes of the council, the only girl to fail in a school of males. It burned like acid in my chest.

Suddenly, my stomach grumbled loudly, cutting through the bitterness of my thoughts. Hunger gnawed at me, a sharp reminder that even in my frustration, my body still needed nourishment. A part of me considered ignoring the hunger, but I couldn't. Not with the ache in my belly so fierce. The cafeteria was somewhere in this building, and though I'd been warned not to mingle with the others, surely no one would notice if I snuck down for a small bite of bread. The mere thought of food made my stomach twist and grumble impatiently. Resolute, I left my bed and grabbed my cloak for warmth. The building was chilly, and covering myself up wouldn't seem out of place. As I tiptoed down the stairs, I savored the way the carpet silenced my footsteps. My cloak billowed behind me like silent wings, merging into the shadows. As I descended further, a muffled buzz reached my ears. I slowed my pace, scanning for others nearby. By the time I reached the bottom, I noticed no one around, yet the voices continued to hum with excitement in the air, beckoning me closer. When I peeked through the open archway, I found the cafeteria bustling with males eagerly waiting for their meals. Realizing I should probably avoid the crowd, I stepped back from the lively scene and headed toward what I guessed was the kitchen, hoping to be more discreet and escape the throngs.