Yoon
I was biting my lower lip until it was already bleeds and stared at the unconscious boy in front of me wearing the oxygen thing, I don't know what it call. My fingers kept on fiddling with each other that it almost scratch my skin as I get very anxious from time to time.
Soon, I felt a pat on my shoulder but I didn't bother about it. I kept staring at him blankly, chewing my lower lip that had been damaged.
"Yoon-ah."
I heard a female voice but still, I didn't give her any responses. My heartbeat was unusual. My feet were stiffed in fear about what'll happen next. A warm hands then hold my hands that were trembling and scratching the skin that it tore up. Immediately, it stopped.
"Stop worrying. He'll be fine."
Fine? Fine? Fine? Is he really fine? The word fine was just an empty word to me right now. How is he fine when all I saw in front of me is a dying body with wires all over it. Fine? That's just a bullshit. Nothing is fine right now.
I shut my eyes and lower down my head. I can't think of anything. All I can feel is scared. Nothing more than that. All of this bullshit... when will it end? How much more people do I have to lose? Mom, hyung, dad, who is barely I'm losing and now him, that person that was so precious in my life?
"It's okay, Yoon. The doctor said-"
"If I didn't push him, he won't be like this."
I mutters under my breath. I didn't dare to open my eyes nor look up to the sick person in front of me. It's a painful sight to see. I feel a light massage on my left shoulder.
"It was just a minor injury. It's okay."
"It's okay because it's my fault."
I decided to look up to the woman beside me with an empty emotion as I took away my hands from hers.
"Now that I realized, I'm the reason why people around me is leaving."
I said. Yeah, it's true. Mom's dead because she gave birth of me. Hyung's dead because he was trying to save me from an accident. And now, Jungkook's dying because I was too harsh to him.
I look at my hands that were so pale because I was in fear and it was still trembling. I clenched it into a fist that my nails dig in my skin.
"Maybe I shouldn't have born in this world."
"What the hell are you saying?!"
I heard a loud voice yelled at me from the door as I weakly look at the person. Ahn Solji. She stomped her feet to me and clutch onto my collar, pulling me up. She was already fuming in anger as she stared at me.
"Yah! What did you said again?! You shouldn't have born in this world?!"
She yelled. All I can do is stare at her eyes blankly and let her do whatever she wants to me.
"Yah, yah. Ahn Solji. Calm down. It's hospital."
I heard Yoongi's voice echoed in the quiet ward as he tried to pull Solji away from me. I can't react to her. I think I don't deserve to do that either. Solji pushed him away and back to me.
"What will Jungkook do if you're not in this world?! Yah! You crazy bitch, listen to me! This guy, laying on this fucking bed is hurting not because of you. If it's not because of you, I bet he's now in the coffin! Do you understand me?!"
I felt my knees wobbled as she yelled in front of my face. Mrs Jeon then pulled her away from me and calm her down as I fell on my butt on the chair weakly. I think I'm crazy. I can't feel anything. I heard a sobbing in front of me and I know it's Solji's. I lowered down my head, staring at my cold trembling and pale hands blankly.
