"I thought I heard my phone ring, did someone call me?" I interrogated Nasir the second I hit the corner. The anticipated call from Cube had me on the edge of my seat at all times. I didn't know exactly what I'd say to him, but hearing his voice alone was all that I needed at this time.
Nasir shrugged. "Yeah, some nigga. I was trying to communicate that you were uh, blowing up the toilet at the moment and to call back but they hung right up." shit. I overlooked the fact this kid just implied I was dropping a load and became overwhelmed with panic as a million different scenarios O'Shea could be imagining came to mind. If hopping on that plane hadn't costed me the best significant other to enter my life, this might have.
"Did he sound mad? I-I mean, did you talk long enough to detect any... hostile emotion in his voice?" I found my self on one end of the room, then the other as a hammering sensation nearly broke through my chest. The boy's tongue skidded across his bottom lip and one of his eyebrows twitched upward.
"He had some aggression in his voice, I figure that must be your mans since you're pacing like moms just found out some dirt you did." His raspy voice carried an amused tone. "Look, call him back. If you're lucky he'll let you explain yourself. If not, give him some time then try again. Keep in mind, a heartbroken nigga is a heartless nigga, I'd advise you not let the situation stir too long."
That was good advice, though if my mind went blank before, what the hell could I say to him now? Didn't matter, I didn't have time to deliberate. I picked up my phone and dialed Eric's number, it was more likely than not his cell O'Shea had called from. It rang, and rang, and rang. No answer. Sweat damn near busted from my forehead. I tried again. It rang with no answer. The third time, right before I would've tossed my phone out the window and sat in a puddle of my own tears, Eric's voice sounded through the speaker following a sigh.
"Yes, Ms. Lopes?" He spoke lazily, as if exhausted by ignoring my calls.
"E, you're still with O'Shea right? Please tell me you are, please." I begged, but my pleading eyes looked towards the sky, silently begging whoever was up there to magically zap him next to Eric if he wasn't already. There was a small pause before his next response.
"His ass is here. He don't wanna talk to you though, you already know that."
"It's not even like that though, I wasn't in the room and someone else was so they picked up."
"He's not going for that. I don't even have to tell him to know he's not going for that. You know he was worried about them New York fools as is, then a nigga answers your phone? Not looking good for you, Le."
"Give him the phone." I demanded. Too much shuffling could be heard, indicating they were probably playing catch because O'Shea did not want to speak to me. Apparently Eric won.
"What?" O'Shea growled.
"'Shea I don't know what you're thinking but you know me better than this, I wouldn't step out on you if my life depended on it. I was in the bathroom, Nas picked up, that's all."
He scoffed. "Bathroom? That's what you're going with? Might as well had told me you were busy cooking eggs on your bare ass."
I rolled my eyes and held a hand to my forehead. "I'm serious. Listen, I know you thought the worst when you pictured me out here with all these guys, and I'm sorry I went against what you wanted but we're solid. And no 'Yo, yo, yo' ass New York nigga could compromise that. I thought we trusted each other, 'Shea. Or at least I trust you. I mean you asked how I would feel about you out of state with groupies, and nah I wouldn't like ten bitches in your face like that, but did I ever think you'd disrespect me for a nut." I gathered myself to avoid my voice cracking as I spit out my next string of words. "D-did I do something? I mean I didn't think I gave you a reason not to trust me but... did I?"
There was an interval of silence, I thought maybe he'd just hung up. Then I heard "You gave me a reason the second you got on that plane. Then I thought to myself 'nah she's a good one, she wouldn't do you like that'. My dumb ass... Take care." just before the call end.
My phone flew towards the couch and Nas shielded himself from the large brick. I let myself fall to the ground and as much as I wanted to sob loudly, I didn't want to embarrass myself any further in front of someone I didn't even know. So I moistened my palms instead.
There was a silence and I could tell Nasir was uncomfortable without seeing him. Some girl he didn't know was inaudibly weeping at the loss of a relationship, and it was, in a way, his fault. After awhile a heavy sign came from the short lump on the couch and his footsteps neared. I felt an arm drape across my back.
"Don't cry, shorty. You'll get right with your mans, don't stress it. He'll come around he just don't know what to believe. And look, don't feel bad for coming out here, a'ight? You have a right to experience new places, people, and things, you shouldn't let anyone deny you that. You didn't cheat on the man, you good." He consoled and tried to convince me. I couldn't help feeling like the worst kind of person though.
