letters to you

2 am texts

"everything's everywhere, the world is just a horrible place."

"i just want it to end. i feel nothing. i'm terrified of everything, my bestfriends hate me, my parents are fighting again, rumors, dark nights, emptiness, i still love you. and i can't talk about it to anyone because no one will listen. you were always there for me, at my best and worst. but you got tired of that i suppose."

"i just want it to go away."

i closed my eyes and sighed.

my phone goes off, i turn it over seeing it's a text from you. my heart beats faster, seeing your name. i miss you those three simple words I read off the screen, it makes my heart ache. it's 2 am, of course it's at this time. where you can just sleep off the mistakes you make. i read it not knowing what to say, i look at it over and over making sure it actually says that. i text back of course you'd say this at 2 in the morning, go to sleep. oh and if you couldn't tell, i miss you more. I don't regret what I said, I felt weak and under his power, but I didn't mind—it felt good to talk to him.

                                                       love alyssa