letters to you

i miss you

"i don't know what exactly to say, but whatever comes to mind i'm saying it. okay first off. i.still.love.you, honestly i don't think i ever stopped, it's been over 3 months and I'm still not over it. it's just I miss the love, the hugs, messages, songs, hand holding, the way you made me feel so happy—where it wasn't fake. but what i miss most, is you. we shared so many memories together, but that's all i have now..memories, things that can never be real again. you made me so happy, then—then that's when it happened. you didn't love me anymore, she took your love, she got your eye, she got my whole world. all my happiness wrapped into one person. i can't stop thinking about it, it's actually over, everything. and what makes it worse is i know i wont be this for a long time. i'm not even sure you loved me, was i a way to just "pass time"? i shouldn't expected so much from you anyways. i loved you with everything i had, i've said is before and i'm gonna say it again, you made me happy. but then you took it away. but you just want to be friends, hurts a lot. not to have you. you expect me not to hate you after all the pain, but i cant even do that. dammit, i still fucking love you.

and it consumes me every day."

p.s i may not always be in love with you, but I will always love you

    love alyssa