50 states of crazy

The Colonies

"So...Mr. America, how did your children come to be?" Japan asked.

America smiled and laughed a little, cuddling Alaska and Hawaii as they giggled at their father's playfulness. "Well it all started back in 1732..."

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The British Empire now had 13 colonies existing in North America. America was in his teenage years. The English colonies were thriving. He smiled as he walked through the streets of New York. Everything was beautiful. He loved the bustling streets, families walking together while smiling and laughing. It did make him a bit sad though.

England and Canada were his only known family. Neither of them visited him much. He had a special place for them in his heart even though they rarely saw each other. It would all be fine soon though, because England was coming to visit today. Alfred walked into his small house that he shared with a family that took in orphans.

The family were known as the Jones family. They were a sweet family, always doing their very best for Alfred. They knew who he was, but they still willingly took him in and raised him just the same.

"Alfred, dear is that you?" Mrs. Jones called out sweetly.

"Yes, mother it's me!" He called back, hanging up his coat and taking off his shoes as he came in the house.

She came over and hugged him happily. "My how grown up you are. It seems just like yesterday you were a young lad," she laughed sweetly.

He couldn't help but laugh with her. "Are Mary and Benjamin here?" Alfred asked curiously.

Mary and Benjamin were the only Jones kids that survived throughout the long, harsh years. They looked up to Alfred as their older brother, even if he didn't age.

"Well..they are upstairs...we have something to tell you my dear.." Mrs. Jones said nervously.

Alfred raised an eyebrow, but went up the squeaky, wooden steps. He opened the door, eyes widening at the sight in front of him. There in front of him were Mary and Benjamin with 13 babies. A couple of them looked to be about a year old, the others very newly welcomed into the world.

"Did...you adopt them?" Alfred hoped looking at the woman.

She fiddled with her hands. "N-no Alfred...they're yours."

The boy nearly had a heart attack on the spot. There's no way that these kids are his. The boy was only 19 and a virgin...
"They can't be!! I-I did not do anything with anyone mama you have to believe me!"

"I believe you dear! They were left on the doorstep...apparently these children represent your colonies.." Mrs. Jones soothed the panicked boy.

Alfred was shaking as he looked at the kids. He can't take care of them. He's too young. He was so worked up that he didn't notice the doorbell ring. "I-I'll get it," he sniffles as he wiped his eyes and marched downstairs.

He flung the door open as gasped. "E-England! I-it's you!" He blushed embarrassed. How could he forget he was coming?!

The Brit smiled and hugged him tightly. "Oh America. You've gotten so big!"

Alfred blushed some more, hugging his caretaker back. "Mhmm y-yeah..I keep hearing that.."

"What's the matter lad? You look so tense," Arthur questioned as he put a hand on his cheek. "My god you're burning up. Are you not feeling well?"

"I-I'm ok I swear it!!" Alfred whimpered.

The Brit shook his head unconvinced. "You're lying. It's not good to lie, love. Come on now, lets get you to bed ya?"

Alfred kept insisting he was fine, but Arthur pushed him inside the house, dragging him up the steps and to the spare bedroom.
"That's it, love, lay down. I'll have Mrs. Jones make you some tea to drink," he smiled and kissed his head.

Alfred blushed and squirmed. He's felt something for England ever since he turned 17. He never told a soul because it was thought to be sinful and wrong. He didn't want to be judged. He nodded shyly and rubbed his eyes.

England was about to walk down the steps when he heard something from another room. He slowly opened the door, seeing the 13 babies. His mouth fell open as he stared at the children. He went over to each crib, seeing the name of the colony on little blankets. He rummaged through the desk, finding a note.

Alfred,
This is hard to explain, but these are your children. They represent each British colony. I know you may be shocked at this new found information, but please try to understand. You will be a great father Alfred.

~unknown

The Brit put down the letter in disbelief, feeling anger and sadness wash over him. He stormed back to where Alfred was resting and crossed his arms. "So I see you were a little busy while I was gone," he spat as he handed Alfred the note.

Alfred read over it, flustered as ever. "Please England I can explain. I just found out. That's why I'm all hot and stuff! I-i don't know what to do!! They just showed up here!"

England calmed down a bit sitting at the edge of the bed. "What are you going to do Alfred? There are 13 children here. You can't possibly take care of all of them."

Alfred sighed and looked down. "Y-yeah...I know."

The Brit ran a hand through his own hair. "I suppose...I could stay for a while..And help you raise the children..."

Alfred jumped up and hugged him tightly. "Oh England thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you!!!!" He exclaimed over and over as he crushed Arthur in a tight hug.

"Y-yes w-well I-its the least I could do. N-now let me go!" The Brit hissed.

America blushed. "O-oh sorry England."

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About 2 weeks went by. The colonies were growing at an alarming rate. Neither man knew why this would be. Virginia already resembled a 3 year old. He was waddled around and babbling about nonsense ever since he learned to speak his first words. Pennsylvania was very much the same. The two colonies would sit and play with each other for hours on end. The girls were a little more reserved. Maryland would play with Georgia's curly brown hair while New Jersey tugged on Alfred's hair instead. They all seemed to get along quite nicely. America and England really had bonded over the kids. The kids would even call them both dad. They would blush at the statement but ignore it afterwards.

After about a month with America and the colonies, England had to leave. America was saddened. He felt that the house was empty, even though there were 17 people, including himself, living there all together. Months went by and the colonies grew and grew...and then came the revolution.

************Present Day***********

"Alright that's enough," England coughed as he crossed his arms. "I don't like talking about the revolution."

"Yes I know," America nodded understandingly. "But yeah anyway dudes that's how my states came to be! Every time a new territory was claimed and a new state was formed, a new baby showed up."

All the countries nodded and talked amongst themselves. Spain raised his hand.

"Yeah dude?" America raised an eyebrow curiously.

"So does this mean Florida and California are partly mine-"

Romano spit out his water.