The Love Hotline [ ✓ ]

IX

Gideon | Carys

Hey, Cupid.

What now?

Did you know that Romans used to whiten their teeth with their own pee?

Sometimes, I feel like you look up "top 10 strangest things to tell a friend" and just blurt them out through text message.

Hey. A magician never reveals his tricks.

You re the strangest person I have ever talked to.

Don't sell yourself short. But back to business... I asked Logan about you today.

Oh? And what did he say?

Well, he didn't say anything. He just laughed and walked away, mumbling something.

NICE. So he does keep his promises. That's comforting to hear.

He's as loyal as a golden retriever but I thought my friendship with him was an exception.

So you still have no leads to who I am?

Kelly gave me a few ideas.

Oh no. What did she say?

Nothing I didn't know before. That you were a female and you had lots of hair.

Wow. You had doubts about my physical appearance and my gender?

For all I knew, you could have been a creepy 40 year old guy who had nothing better to do than match people up.

I feel so flattered that you think this highly of me.

Why can't you give me a clue?

Because...

Because...?

Well, I work anonymously for a reason, Gideon.

But I'm your longest customer.

Logan was talking to me for a whole year before he gathered his courage to ask Kelly out.

Well then I guess we'll have to be talking for a year and a day.

You do know that this isn't a competition on who can talk to me for the longest right?

It isn't?

But apparently it's a competition on who takes the longest to find their masculinity. I think you might need longer than a year and a day for that.

I don't even know why I continue to be in this sort of abusive relationship with you.

Because you love me and you never want to go a day without talking to me.

True.

What?

What? Nothing. What?

You do know this is text so I can just read and re-read things over and over again.

Shut up. I know how texting works. I'm just used to talking to people and it's influencing the way I text.

Okay. Whatever you say, child.

I'm not a child. I think I'm older than you. When's your birthday?

27th of Nope-not-telling-you-ber.

But the date was right, right?

Wouldn't you like to know?

Oh come on. I think it's only fair that I know one thing about you since you know pretty much everything there is to know about me.

That's because everything about you is practically plastered all over the school. "Gideon Payne takes on Pacific High", "Gideon Payne and mystery girl?", "Gideon Payne; dumber than we think?"

Hey! That last one was as stupid as your face.

I'm not sure it's possible for a face to be stupid but I do know that you can be stupid and that's what you became.

Anyway. Jenna gave me a second chance.

Changing the subject, are we? But wow. I can't believe she actually gave you a second chance.

Well, I'm irresistible.

Keep dreaming. You might get there in the year two thousand and never.

I don't need this sort of negativity in my life. But back to Jenna... I'm taking her out on a romantic dinner on a cruise. How's that for sweeping a girl off their feet?

I don't know. She doesn't seem like the type to like water very much considering that mandatory swimming lesson the whole grade had to go through.

She said she was sick.

I didn't know someone could turn green so fast after less than ten seconds in water.

Stop attacking Jenna and me. Sometimes I just wonder if you're jealous of our love.

You wish, Payne. You wish.

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