Exemplary

Chapter Two: Pity

Sometime, during the late hours of the night I finally reached my bedroom. I was finally away from all the colors, wigs, dyed eyebrows, genetically altered hibiscus flowers and found myself in my carefully planned sanctuary that no one had a say in. 

It was mine and no one's views or opinions will ever be able to change a thing about it. 

Once I walked in I carefully shut the white metallic door that blocked the rest of the Capitol out, and silently twisted the lock in place ensuring the utmost privacy. I routinely sauntered over to the bathroom door and pushed it open, flicking the light on before walking in and shutting that door behind me as well. I first washed the little makeup that I willed myself into putting on earlier this evening and watched as the neutral brown from my eye shadow mix in with the black of my eyeliner, mingling as it was whisked down the drain into oblivion. I reached over for the pastel pink face towel that hung beside the sink's mirror and brought it to my face, allowing it to soak the liquid used to cleanse my face. 

Over the folded edge of the towel, my eyes caught onto their reflection in the mirror that hung effortlessly before me. Lowering the towel, I took in every feature of my face. My rosy, pink lips, my naturally occurring flushed cheeks, my gray eyes and dark brown hair that set me off instantly from my family. 

I would be perfect if I just dyed my hair blond or some other extravagant color and had the surgery that would give me a lively green pigment to my steel gray eyes. Or that's what my mother and our family stylist says. 

Every time, however, I refuse. Even if it makes me stand out from my blond hair, green eyed family. Even if it makes me seem boring in the light of the Capitol. There's nothing in this world that would make me change those things about myself, because it's those things that make me...

"Different." I whispered to the reflection of myself in the mirror. 

At least in the sense that I haven't allowed the Capitol to change me physically - although I will acknowledge that I've given them a hard time to do so mentally too. 

I toss the towel onto the counter of the sink and open the door, flicking the light back off as I walk back into my bedroom. 

It was full of light, airy colors. Pastel pinks, oranges and yellows. Nothing was vibrant or had the ability to catch the eye at a glance, but instead everything was designed so that your eyes were at ease and weren't assaulted with every blink you unintentionally took. 

I walked over to my dresser, stripping myself bare of the pastel green dress that I had dawned for the day and allowing it to pool at my feet before I stepped out of it and into a more comfortable outfit - a simple white oversize sweater. Pulling my arms through the sleeves, I walked over to my bed and finally plopped into it letting out a long overdue sigh. 

Sinking into the pillows, I allow my eyes to slide shut as tried to follow the murky water of my makeup into oblivion.

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A few hours have passed and I finally accept that oblivion does not welcome my presence. The past twenty or so minutes have been spent by me rolling from side to side, trying every angle to find my perfect sleeping position. All of which was to no avail. 

Finally, letting out a frustrated grunt, I swung my legs over the edge of my pillow topped bed and planted my feet onto the cool, wooden floors beneath. I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a pair of shorts and slipped them on before unlocking my bedroom door and leaving my sanctuary.