placebo's machine

Leapt 13

Leapt

Eva stayed outside long after it grew dark.

It made the landscape look somewhat pretty, smoothing scars and making the dirt glow silver. If she closed her eyes she could hear rustlings of the wind that made her imagine animals lurking in the bushes. It may be a frightening image, but to her it seemed comforting.

A breeze came up, chilling her lips and making her huddle inside the coat she was still wearing. Kurt said that because of all the disaster, the weather had been messed around so much that there were no definitive seasons anymore, but Jan said that it really was colder most of the time in winter. Aside from the snowstorm she had blown in on, it had apparently been very mild.

Eva was confused.

She didn’t know where she came from.

She didn’t know where she was going.

What was better, her past or her future? She had no choice but to say past, because the present wasn’t very wonderful.

Though she didn’t know her past.

Maybe she was just a being of acting on instinct, because she wasn’t quite sure why she stood and shed her coat.

Eva let her wings extend for the first time that she had been there.

The thin fabric of her shirt tore easily, buttons threatening to come undone in the front but being spared when the back turned to rags. Her wings spread behind her, seeming unfit for an angel with their metal and glass but her body seemed used to them.

The lights seemed to come on so slowly.

They flickered down, and the white light seemed warm not cold. Eva spread her arms, embracing the purple hull of the sky and raising her chest, taking a deep breath.

All she could do was keep on living.

And she would try to enjoy it, best as she could.

She spread her fingers as if trying to grab the sky, feeling as if she had done it before with some tangible barrier. But now there was no barrier, but she still tried.

Eva let her arms drop to her sides, taking a breath. She still felt cold. Quickly she wrapped the coat back around her shoulders, and scurried indoors.

Jan and Kurt didn’t ask where she had been, just set a bowl of thin soup in front of her. Kurt turned on the radio, which was currently hovering between a speech by the president and an obituary.

“-I promise in my coming term that I will try to combat this disaster by-”

“-Martha Benduski, Eric Mothersbaugh, Anya Fang-”

“-With this, success is unavoidable. Slowly, we will reclaim Florida and-”

“-Preston Barrow, Ann Marie Lang, Hanlu Jin-”

“-And God as my witness, I will not let this country-”

“-Elaine Zhang, Ivan Hospic, Alyssa Carson-”

“-burn.”

Clapping came from the radio, the sound of it tinny and false.

Kurt frowned and turned the dial to another station. Music drifted through, disconnected and faraway. The words spoke of happiness, but the tone of the singer seemed reluctant to lie.

Jan stirred her soup, humming along with the music. Kurt tapped his fingers. Eva felt out of place, with nothing to contribute, so she whispered the words under her breath.