A New Form of Therapy

Truth Be Told...

Wow.

I don't know if I say that in my head or out loud, but Justin is smiling as he pulls away. I can feel my own lips curved as well. He unconsciously licks his lips, something I picked up on that he does often. It drives me crazy though.

"Please stay back here," he pleads. "I have to get back on stage."

"I want to," I say honestly. "But I'm here with Marcus. I need to get back to my seat."

"Call me tonight then," Justin says. His voice is the same, but I can see that dejected look in his eye. I can feel it in myself too.

"I promise," I say.

We share one more quick kiss, something I know I shouldn't do, before I walk down the ramp alone. Justin is already onto his next song when I return to my seat. To my boyfriend. My very public boyfriend. Who I just cheated on.

"Did you have fun?" Marcus asks.

More than I care to admit to you, I think. "Yeah," I say. "I definitely made some good memories to associate with Justin now. Thank you." Thank you for setting this entire thing up so that I could do the one thing I shouldn't have done but that I'm still oh-so-glad did happen. That kiss was amazing.

"Any time," Marcus says. His arm snakes around my waist and rests on my lower back, right where Justin's had been just minutes ago in front of everyone.

After the concert, it's a craze to get back to the car. There are people everywhere and the ones that recognize me as the 'luckiest girl in the world' asked a million questions about being on stage with him. Of course I lied through my teeth. To me, it wasn't a big deal. I've been a lot closer to Justin than having him sing to me. I most definitely left out the quick make out session as the doors closed. And the fact that I'm going to call him in just another hour or so once I get home.

"Tonight was fun," Marcus says as we get into the car. Thankfully, it doesn't take us long to be able to pull out of our parking spot.

"It was." I don't look at his face, choosing to stare out of the window instead. "Thank you, for everything."

"Not a problem," Marcus says.

We go silent after that, enjoying the drive on the interstate. I have my window down and am just looking out at the cars and buildings passing by. The radio is playing something that I'm not too familiar with. I try not to think about what I just did. How am I supposed to tell Marcus? Do I tell Marcus? Or was what Justin and I briefly shared just a one time thing? Like our way of saying goodbye?

It's a weird way to say goodbye, I think to myself. That's certainly wasn't goodbye. Or even a see you later, let's be friends. That was an I miss you and I want you back kind of deal. I felt it and I know Justin felt it too. I turn my head and look at Marcus. How am I supposed to break the news to him?

"Are you okay?" Marcus asks, glancing to me and then back to the road. We are five exits from where we need to turn off.

"I'm just a little worn out," I say. It's the truth. Today has been a long and emotional day. I'm physically exhausted and ready to fall into bed and I'm emotionally exhausted and ready to talk to Justin and figure out exactly what we are after that. "Did you have anything else planned for the night?"

"Why?"

"I'm just wondering," I say. "I'm about to fall asleep in this seat right here. This date has been amazing, but it has definitely worn me out. I have to work early in the morning too." I have two clients tomorrow, one rather early in the morning and the other around noon.

"I can just take you home," Marcus says. "I'm kind of beat too."

The conversation lulls again and I spend the rest of the thirty minute drive from the interstate to my apartment looking out the window, trying not to fall asleep. My phone buzzes with a text as I'm about to get out of the car. I don't look at it right away though, knowing very well who it is.

"Thank you, again, for tonight. I had a lot of fun."

Marcus leans over the console and plants a soft kiss on my lips. I close my eyes, picturing a completely different guy in front of me. "Same," Marcus says against my lips. "Hopefully we can find time to go out again soon."

"Yes," I say before I realize what that means. "I'll call you soon, but text me so I know you got home okay."

"Will do," Marcus says as he settles back into his seat.

I head through the front door of the apartment building and nod to the night guard. I know all of the staff by name. Jonson is on duty tonight. Normally, I would stay and chat with him, but I'm in a hurry to get to my bed.

I jog up the flights of stairs, pulling my keys out of my pocket. As I walk through the apartment, I flip on every light. It took me a while getting sued to living alone. I thought about getting a cat or a small dog since pets are allowed in the building, but I just hadn't gotten around to it yet. Maybe I would since it is starting to get colder and I'll be staying in more versus having to leave him/her alone.

I change my train of thought as I settle into my pajamas and drag my comforter from my bed to the living room. I turn on Netflix and put a movie on, not really caring which one it is. I finally look at my phone. The text is from Justin.

Are you home yet? I'm on the bus. I'll be awake for a while. Call when you can.

I smile at his text and hit reply. Just got home. About to fall asleep though. Today was... exciting. I add a winky face emoji and hit send.

He replies back after a couple minutes. Today was exciting. I'm glad it happened. I don't regret it. Do you?

Do I regret it? I regret that it happened while I was on a date with my boyfriend. But do I regret the kiss itself? No. I just don't know what it means for us now...?

The three dots show up immediately and they stay there for a minute. When Justin's text comes through, it's pretty long.

I want it to mean that we can give us another try. I miss you. I miss just being around you and being able to kiss you like that whenever we're together. I miss the way that you wrinkle your nose when you're thinking about something or the way that I feel when I'm with you. I can't even explain the feeling I get when I see your face. Even if we have to keep it a secret, I just want to know that I can be with you, that I can see you and talk to you...

Another texts pops up as I'm rereading the first one, the smiling on my face impossible to wipe off at the moment.

What do you want it to mean for us?

I want it to mean that we are together too. I want all of the things that he said and more. I think it means I love you and I want to be with you.

I hit send and wait for his reply.

**YAY! I just couldn't wait to update so I sat down and wrote the next chapter! And it's a long one too! What do you think of Justin and Lindsey's conversation? How should she handle things with Marcus? Please comment because I LOVE reading what you're thinking and I try to reply to everyone! Also, I love hearing your ideas because I like to try and incorporate them all somehow.**