Clemency (DNF)

ii

After History, I shuffle out of the room quickly so Ethan can't get to me. I know he wants to. I know he wants to confront me and get angrier and angrier at me. But I won't let him.
But I'm still too slow.

"Mimi!" I hear him call my name. Others are turning to stare. I used to love the way he said my name. We were such great friends. But then it happened. I didn't know he--

Ethan pushes through the herd of students who are trying to get out of the class. I don't stop. I push forward. I squeeze through two boys who shoot me death glares. I cower under their gazes and dart out of there.

I don't stop. He'll kill me. He'll kill me just like I killed his sister.

I shake my head trying squeeze the tears back in. One escapes. I escape, too. I'm out of the class. My lower lip is trembling. I run a hand through my blue streaked hair. Stop crying, Miriam. You'll ruin your makeup. Like I cared about my makeup. I run down the hall and to my locker, my footsteps merging into one racket with a hundred more. My heart is pounding like a herd of bulls stampeding in a field.

Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.
He'll kill me.

I fumble with the lock, my hands shaking. It doesn't open. I give up.

"I just need to talk to you." He was behind me. I don't turn around. Ignore him. Ignore him, Mimi. Don't turn around. I squeeze my eyes shut. I didn't mean to kill her. I'm sorry...
He grabs my arm and twists me around to face him. I suppose he could see the fear in my gray eyes because he softens his grip.

"Let me go." My voice is barely audible. Weak. Pathetic.

"Only if you'll talk to me. Do what I told you to in that note." He says in a low voice, as if he doesn't want anyone else to hear. I quickly nod. Maybe. Maybe not. I might ditch him.
He releases me. That's when we notice the whole hallway watching us. Well, it must be surprising. He hated me. Why would he be talking to me? Not that I wanted him to hate me...

Heat crawls up my neck and covers my face. I turn around and attempt to open my locker again.

Ethan strolls off as if nothing happened. A hundred eyes follow us like hawks. Eventually, everyone gets back to their own business. But still, I can hear hushed whispers and can see eyes darting to me all throughout the day.

I hear the front door slam closed. My family was home. I slam the my laptop shut and spin around in my chair. Everyday, Mom went to pick up Matt and Jenny from school. Jenny comes rushing into my room, holding up a sheet of paper in front of her.
"Look, Mimi! I got a certificate!" she says, grinning wildly.

"Wow. What's it for?" I ask, taking it from her to get a better look.
"I have the best handwriting in my class!" she giggles giddily. Kids get excited over anything. It's ridiculous. But it's adorable.

"That's awesome!" I whoop and hug her. Her huge grin is contagious. Within seconds, I'm smiling big and wide, too.

Matt comes into my room looking glum.

"Hey, kiddo! What's wrong?" I ask, concerned.

"I got into a fight today," he mutters in response. A fight. That was so not like him. I grab him by his hand and gently pull him closer.

"Why? What for?"

"Billy said bad things about you." he looks up at me with his big green eyes. He and Mom are the only two who have those beautiful eyes. Jenny and mine are brown like Dad's.

I hold in a gasp. I'm surprised. Not because some kid said something bad about me. I don't even know how this Billy guy knows about me. But I'm shocked because my little brother stood up for me. He got into a fight for me. Usually, Matt was a shy kid.

"Aw," I gush. "You got into a fight? For me?" I plant a kiss on his cheek, and he pulls back, grinning.

"Yeah." He was blushing. He was so cute.

"Stop encouraging him, Miriam," Mom says firmly, stepping inside my room, but there is a smile on her face.

"Right. No more fights Matty," I jokingly shake my finger at him and ruffle his hair.

I follow them all out into the kitchen, where Mom fixes a snack for them. Jenny and Matt head towards the other room to watch their daily cartoons. I grab bag of chips and start to head back to my room.

"Wait a minute, would you?" She didn't sound angry. More like upset. But calm. That was my mother for you. She was a child psychologist so she knew her ways with us.

Yikes. What'd I do now? I slowly turn on my heel and raise my eyebrows at her, popping a chip in my mouth.

"Yeah?" I mumble.

"Your report card," she states simply, and holds up a light brown paper envelope. The seal was open. She had checked it. What did it say? She looked faintly disappointed. As far as I knew, I got A's and B's on my assignments and I had done well in the exams. Maybe she thought me to be a straight-A student. Ugh.
"Your performance in class is what I'm upset about, Miriam. Your teachers say you never participate in class discussions and such."

Oh. Right.

"Why? You used be so talkative and always loved to share your thoughts."
She doesn't know. She doesn't know what I did. She doesn't know that if I said a single word in public I might do it again...

I fumble with my fingers. I shrug.
"I want you to improve by the next semester, okay?"

"Okay, I'll try." I nod and turn to leave.

"Miriam, why don't I ever see you hanging out with friends?" she asks softly. I bite my lower lip. She had noticed. Then a light bulb lit up inside my head.

"Actually, Mom, I'm going out with a friend today at four," I grin widely.
"Oh, that's just great, honey." She kisses me on the forehead.

"I'm gonna go get ready, okay?" She nods.

Now I have to go.What have I gotten myself into?