Valid Weaknesses ||Completed|| #Wattys2017

Chapter 1

Valerie

"Valerie! Dinner!"

"Coming!" I yell. Forcing myself off my bed, I make my way downstairs to see that everyone else is already seated at the table; As usual.

Mum's prepared spaghetti and meatballs and it smells absolutely delicious but the sight of my brother's girlfriend ruins my appetite. I mean, does she have to be here today of all days? What's wrong with her place?

Don't get me wrong, it's not that I have a personal beef with Hayley or anything. I just don't like seeing her at my house. With her pretty blue eyes and perfectly straight white teeth. Oh and don't forget that angelic attitude right there. She is such an attention hog. Sometimes I think of how nice it would feel to give her a hug and then slowly trail my hands up to her neck to give it a hug too. Let's see how those pretty blue eyes sparkle then.

"Earth to, ladybug." Danny, my brother says, pulling my cheek playfully. I smile and shove him lightly but God knows I hate it when he calls me that.

Mum asks 'little miss perfect' also known as Hayley to say grace which doesn't take long and when we dig in, I have to admit, dinner is amazing. My taste buds dance gleefully in delight with each mouthful I take. There's just something about mum's pasta that always leaves me feeling delirious.

"So how was school today?" dad asks, glancing at my way.

"I got picked as second speaker for the debate next week." I offer halfheartedly, piling food into my mouth to stall for time.

"Why not first?" mum says and she's got that look on her face. You know the one that says 'Does the student who got to be the first speaker have two heads? Why can't you be just as good? And I mentally roll my eyes.

"They only wanted seniors." I mutter, pretending to be really interested in my plate.

"But if you're good enou-

"Just don't dad!" I half yell, losing my cool. How typical of my parents. Instead of being proud of me just this once they'd rather compare me to some other kid who's elsewhere living their life. Well screw them.

"Young Lady, don't talk to your father that way." mum scolds in a really stern voice.

Me, I just push out of my chair and storm off.

"Get back here Valerie." Dad commands but I don't listen and I don't stop walking until I get to my room. Lord knows I'm sick of them expecting me to be all perfect and over achiever like. I'm not Danny and I'll never be like him. I mean, you'd think that after everything I've been through they'd at least cut me some slack but no, nothing of the sort is going to happen.
Opening my blog, I prepare myself for a new entry.

"What is anger?" I type, propping myself up with a pillow. 

"Anger is a deep feeling of annoyance or irritation towards someone or something.

For me, anger is being the only supposed under achiever in a family of perfectionists. It's wanting to please my parents but being unable to live up to expectation anyway.  It's missing my cousin 'A' everyday and feeling myself submerged in guilt with no way out.

It's that feeling I get whenever I see Danny smiling over at his all so perfect girlfriend and it never occurs in isolation. 

My anger arrives with a myriad of emotions and all I can do is feel them. The kind of pain doesn't matter to me anymore. All that matters is that it demands to be felt and that it is awful. That's what my anger is."

I snap my laptop shut, feeling a bit out of steam. The blog is the only thing I can really call mine and the best part? No one actually knows it's me because I sign every entry off as 'Hideaway Girl'.
That's why I love the internet; you can be whoever you want to be and no one can stop you.

Downstairs, I can hear them talking and laughing. The perfect family; doing so well without me. You know, sometimes I just really wonder why mum and dad didn't stop at one kid. They would have loved it more, I think and 'A' would be here, happy; but then again, who would they boss around?

Picking up a random book, I try to distract myself for lack of anything else to do. This is why I need a TV in my room. At least then I'd only have to go downstairs for the occasional meal.

An hour goes by and I hear Hayley leave the house. Danny's sleeping over so he won't be joining her which sucks because it's not the weekend where we can just hang out like old times.

A soft knock on the door pulls me out of my thoughts.

"Can I come in?" a gruff voice asks. Well speak of the Devil.

"Buzz off Danny."

"I brought cake?" he offers uncertainly.

"What kind?"

"Red Velvet." Damn him. He knows I can't resist red velvet cake. Why can't he just let me sulk in peace?

"It's open." I call resignedly; anything for the cake.

After Danny lets himself in, he sets the cake gingerly on my desk and promptly flops onto my bed. Without giving him any notice, I grab the cake and stuff over half of it in my mouth.

Man, this tastes good.

"Save some for me ladybug." He says, trying to get some but I move farther away from his end of the bed. There's no way I'm sharing this cake with anyone.
"So uh, I'm really proud of you."

I just stare blankly at him, slowly munching on my cake.

"The debate thing." He explains. "I know how hard it is to get there."

Me, I just shrug and finish off my cake.

"Thanks for trying to make me feel better Danny." I say once I'm done chewing. "But I really don't need it. I know I'm good."

He laughs then, shaking his head.

"What?" I ask, feigning ignorance.

"You're really something Val." He says and we both chuckle. That's the thing about Danny, I might hate how perfect he is, but he's still my older brother and I'll always love him.

"Well, I should be getting to sleep." He says, getting off my bed and heading for the door.

"Goodnight ladybug."

"Night Danny." I smile, ignoring the nickname I grew up hating.

He opens the door and then pauses. "Oh and Hayley says hi."

And just like that, the spell is broken. My smile curves downwards and I feel my body stiffen. I can tell he notices the change in my expression as I tell him goodnight once more, muttering under my breath about little miss perfect minding her business but he doesn't say anything. Offering a small unnecessary wave, he closes the door behind him.

"Oh and Hayley says hi" I mimic in a ridiculously tiny voice, making air quotes with my fingers as I hear his receding footsteps. My phone vibrates just then, pulling me out of my thoughts. It's a text from Jessica, my best friend, asking me about her outfit of choice. I reply her tiredly, before putting it back on charge and then heading to bed with thoughts of my family wafting in and out of my mind.

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Hey Loves!

I really hope you enjoyed the first chapter and that you'll continue on this new journey with me.

Thank you for taking the time out to look at my work. I really appreciate it.

I'd love to give a shout out to my lovely friend Astrid who runs a blog under the name 'Hideaway Girl'
Most of the framework for Valerie's blog posts were written by her and it is with her permission that I have altered and used them. Thank you so much Astrid.

And thank you! yes you, the lovely person reading this right now. I love you!

Don't forget to Vote, Comment and stay Awesome!