I was not excited for school tommorow. But it must be done. Tommorow I have to go back to pretending. Pretending like everythings ok. Like I don't have suicidal thoughts going on in my head every minute. Like I had a wonderful day with all my friends.
But the truth is I have no friends. I am suicidal and have a little bit of depression. Every minute that I'm beat I edge closer to the darkness. And I'm scared that one day I will just give up and let the darkness take me. Nothing is ok. I know my pack doesn't like seeing me beat up or beating me up. I can see the guilt on their faces as clear as crystal. And that's ok. I would never want them to endure the pain everyone puts me through five days a week.
That's right. I get beat up five days a week. After a while I stopped coming to the nurses office cause she threatened she would tell my parents about this, I can't let them know. At home I am the happy person that everyone looks at and instantly feels better. At school I am the person everyone looks at when they need to release some steam.
Ive also been, not only physically but, mentally abused. Heres a list of the things I have been called or told: idiot, nerd, b*tch, die, just go hang yourself, do everyone a favor and end your life, freak, disgusting, etc., etc.
Honestly, that dark hole is slowly closing in and I don't know what to do. This is a little story about what's been going on in my life. This is the story of how my life changed drastically. This is my love story. This is me, Carisma.
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Saved By An Alpha
Loup-garouShe was bullied and broken. A home she was the innocent girl who everyone loved. A school she was the slut, the whore, you name it. It was horrible what they did to her. One day it just gets to be too much to handle. Will she take her own life or fi...
