One Thing

Change.

I love you guys. I had mixed emotions while writing this which I think shows. I hope you like it. 

Happy Reading!

"Goodnight everyone! We love you all!" Harry screamed into the microphone. Niall jumped onto Louis' back, Liam blew kisses to the crowd and Zayn threw his arm around Harry, waving to the crowd with the other hand. The boys ran off stage, exhausted but hyper all at the same time. I handed them some dishcloths to wipe the sweat off then we made our way back to the dressing room to rest a bit. 

The last few days here hadn't been very eventful. We had gotten into Scotland 2 days ago and had a day to meet fans and look around the area. Yesterday was a day of getting everything ready for the concert and helping Ainsley set everything up because they still hadn't found a new manager for us. 

Today was full of sound check and meeting more fans. I am almost looking forward to the flight over to the U.S. because we will all have some time to sleep. I love meeting the fans and doing the shows but I never knew what exhaustion was until now. 

"Hey Kade, you okay?" Liam asked.

"Huh?" I asked, coming out of my thoughts. "Uh, oh yeah. Fine, just tired. As all of you are." 

"It's catching up to you, huh?" Zayn asked. 

"Oh yeah," I said. I rested my head against the back of the sofa I was sat on in the dressing room. 

"Oh you just wait. Being in the U.S. is so much worse. Time zones are crazy and you are constantly travelling to a different state," Liam said. 

"At least we have our own U.S. tour bus over there now. It was awful when we had to fly to each state because we didn't have any other way to get anywhere," Niall said. 

"Yeah, about that. How are we supposed to go from place to place in the matter of a few hours? I mean we have concerts practically back to back in different states," I questioned. 

"Well, this time everything seems to go smoother. Like, this time we'll have a couple of shows in North Carolina then just drive down to South Carolina and do a few shows there. It all goes in one big line that we can travel pretty quickly," Liam answered. 

"Oh, I see. That makes sense. So, we'll have some sort of break in between. That's good." I noticed the rest of the boys had gone quiet and unmoving, which was rare. I looked over to Niall and Zayn on one sofa, passed out. Zayn was stretched out while Niall curled up on the other end. Louis fell asleep on a small love seat all curled up in a ball. He looked adorable, so fragile.

Harry was passed out on the floor in front of me, my feet creating a shadow over his face. I hadn't noticed him laying down there until now. I looked to Liam on the other side on the sofa I was sat on. In the few minutes that had passed since he had spoken, he had rested his head on the arm of the couch and fallen asleep.

The realization hit me then, these five boys are just normal teenagers. I had that mental state when I first came here, but along the way with the relationships and concerts, I had lost that. I had put myself behind them. Although they were doing exactly the same thing I was, I had still been pushed behind them. Between the fans going crazy over them and not recognizing me, the signings that they go to and I am left on the bus, and the few songs I perform and the multiple songs they sing, I had forgotten that these are ordinary people. Ones I wouldn't have recognized five months ago. 

Instinctively, my fingers ran across my tattoo. "Be You."

I had forgotten this. To be myself. I was caught up in Kathryn, Harry, the concerts, the travelling, I had forgotten to be me. To be myself meant loving everyone, caring for everything anyone did for me. The concerts now seemed normal, the screaming fans were such a normalcy in my life, I was almost to the point of taking it for granted. I need to stop and realize that this isn't an everyday job, this will come to an end, and while I'm in it, I need to make sure I enjoy it. Create lifelong friends, make someones dreams come true like mine did, make someone smile.