The Eighteenth Note

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School is not going well.
I thought that since this will be my last year, studying will be easy to do but such wasn't the case.
See, I find myself sadder everyday.
I have this habit of writing a plan for every night, like the lessons I have to revise and the things that I need to go over again.
I've always liked planning and going through things two times or more just to make sure it was right.
But those days, I find myself not finishing any of it.
And that's making me exhausted and depressed.
I'm getting tired from forcing a smile on my face and pretending to be strong when I'm nothing but weak.
First thing I look for when I got to school is you.
Seeing you calmes me, makes me forget a lot of things.
It is as if you are some kind of drug.
But than when I got to see you, I feel sad.
You are way too far and I am getting tired from watching you from behind.
So I may as well be giving up on you.
The one I've looked at for two years and maybe more.

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