I don't really know what I expected. Maybe for it to end uneventfully, with me in my room, earbuds in and the volume a little too high, or maybe doing some crazy dare and kissing one too many girls for my sexuality to not be called into question, but definitely not like this. Not with my lips against the ones of my best friend's ex. I shouldn't have pushed for more, I should have said no, and above all I shouldn't have enjoyed it.
Hours later I could still feel the way his calloused hands caressed my body with a certain roughness, awakening something inside me I had never felt before. To anyone else, his advances would've seemed too rough and awkward, but it was the way I wanted to be touched. I fell asleep to questions of when it would happen again.
******************
"Sophia, are you listening to me? Sophia?" Chloe snapped in front of my face. "Where are you staring?". Her head spun, scanning the crowd for a familiar face, but she would overlook him, like she always did, choosing to ignore him rather than admit the fact that she let him take advantage of her insecurities. "Nothing Chlo, nothing" I plastered on a smile, grabbing her arm to stop her from searching. She glanced back, a worried expression evident on her face, "You've been off all day, is something up?". Should I tell her? But I dismiss the thought quickly. I have no explanation to what happened. My mouth had something else in mind when it opened and said one of the worst phrases you could say to your best friend, "I kissed your ex".
Her eyes widen in shock for a millisecond before hardening. I can't look away from her face. I don't see hurt in her eyes, but I don't see much of anything really, I was never very good at reading her. We had stopped walking altogether at this point, letting the stream of students split around us as they rushed to leave campus for lunch. I could see the wheels turning in her head. I have to fix this. So I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head, "It was a dare, and I don't really want to have anything to do with him anymore".
She visibly brightened at my words and I relaxed at the sign of a smile on her face again. "I get it, it meant nothing, why would you feel bad about that?", she chirped, happy she had avoided conflict
