Falling Tears

Chapter 23

Jungkook's POV

As Jimin and I walked downstairs for breakfast, I knew my face was still red and I didn't want to face Sumin. After Sumin had closed the door, I had covered my face and refused to get up, burying my face to a pillow. Jimin had laughed at me at first as he put his clothes on to get ready for breakfast, then he had gotten worried when I hadn't moved. He had sat next to me and ruffled my hair, making me look at him from the corner of my eye.

"It's not that big of a deal", he had said. He had flopped on the bed next to me and turned his head so that we were face to face. "Sumin already rooted", he had laughed at the word, "for us, this is nothing new, right? She knew we like each other." He had stopped for a second and then rolled his eyes. "She's probably proud of me. She called me stupid earlier for not doing anything."

"Really?" I had smiled but then thought the thing again. "But it's just..." I hadn't known how to explain my feelings to him. I had felt embarrassed and somehow weird that someone had seen me kiss Jimin. Had seen me kiss, doing something I didn't have much experience in. And Jimin had been so confident or at least had seemed like it. I knew he didn't like attention but I guessed he didn't mind Sumin knowing. He had been right, Sumin had already known we liked each other and she obviously knew we would do something about it at some point.

Still, walking downstairs, now fully clothed, I hid my face and stared at the floor as Sumin handed me a plate. I could feel her eyes on my back as I sat on a chair at the end of the table. Though, in the next second there were hands on my shoulders and they were moving me away. I glanced up and Sumin was smiling at me as she put me sitting next to Jimin who grinned at Sumin.

"You're a couple now, you have to sit together", she explained in a sweet way that only made me grimace and blush even more.

When I finally got to sit down I pushed the plate away enough to put my head on my hands and took a deep breath. It's only Sumin, I reminded myself. What are you going do when the whole world finds out?

The whole world is not going to care, Jungkook.

Whatever...

I had really no idea why I was reacting like this. I knew I wanted to be with Jimin. I wanted to be kissed by him, I wanted him to slide his hands over my body and –

You're getting sidetracked.

Eh. The point was that I wanted, really wanted, Jimin to do those things to me so that wasn't the problem. And I generally didn't care what people thought of me and I knew being gay was okay. I was starting to understand how Jimin didn't like the attention. I didn't want people to stare at me when I held Jimin's hand – that was something I was planning on doing all the time, his hand was so small and cute – or if I wanted to peck his lips. And I surely didn't want Jimin to feel uncomfortable with the attention he would be receiving. There was a possibility that majority of people wouldn't care at all and that was relieving but I wanted to hold his hands without being judged. I knew from Jin and Namjoon's talks that there were homophobic people in our school, staring at them with disgusted faces.

All of this thinking was for nothing and I acknowledged that but it didn't stop me.

I knew I was looking really tensed and that's probably why Jimin put his hand on my knee. It did nothing on calming me down, in fact it did the opposite. My whole body stiffened and I knew Jimin felt it too because he took his hand away immediately.

"Jungkook?" Sumin asked and sounded concerned. I knew I'd have to look at her so I raised my head enough to meet her gaze. She looked at me for a while before frowning. "What's wrong?"