Abused, But Never Used

ch 11 Sasuke's secret part2

His eye lids felt heavy and his head throbbed. He felt three other chakra's near him. Two felt strangely similar and a bit further away. Where as the third felt a kin to his own and seemingly right next to him. What had happened? Where was he? Sasuke wondered. Why did everything ache and slightly sting? Sasuke bolted upright his eyes snapping open in fear as the memories of his training session with hidan hit him full force. His right hand immediately and frantically returned to the curse mark.

"Hey hey hey. Easy little brother. It's okay everythings alright. I'm right here. It's going to be okay. " Itachi assured Sasuke placing his hand comfortingly yet firmly on his brothers shoulder to get him to lie back down. Sasuke did so with little resistance wincing when his back hit the bed. It felt bruised.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Itachi asked sitting on the edge of Sasuke's bed and prying his hand off of his neck. Sasuke tried to fight him and get his hand back over it but Itachi won as per usual.

Sasuke looked down ashamed. His bangs shadowed his eyes. Tears welled in his eyes and he refused to meet his brothers gaze which was practically boring into his very soul at the moment. Sasuke opened his mouth to speak but it quickly snapped closed the words once again getting stuck in his throat. He gave Itachi the smallest of shrugs.

"Do you know what causes it to flare?" Itachi asked gently.

Sasuke nodded in response the tears welling harder in his eyes. He gripped the sheets of the bed he was in. He bit his bottom lip. His shoulders started shaking. The tears streamed from his eyes despite the fact that Sasuke still held them back.

"Hey cmere" Itachi said carefully pulling his baby brother up to his chest. He ran his hand through Sasuke's soft spikes before just resting his hand on his head. An action he vividly remembered doing when Sasuke had gotten upset as a child.

"It's okay Sasuke" Itachi said soothingly. Sasuke clenched his teeth and pushed roughly away from his brother. Sasuke was a mix of distraught, miserable, and seething.

"No it isn't Itachi! This is not okay! I am not okay! I-I can't even use my sharingan because of him! This stupid seal is cursed for a reason Itachi. It's made of his chakra! I literally have a piece of him thats still inside of me and i want it off! I want it out! I hate it! I hate him! I-I hate him! I hate everyone!"

"Sasuke it'll just take time" Itachi said as he attempted to reason with his growingly hysterical baby brother.

"Nothing is going to fix this Itachi! Do you hear me! Nothing! Even if you find a way to remove the damn thing it's not going to do anything!" Sasuke snapped.

"Sasuke calm down your not making sense" Itachi pleaded trying to decode Sasuke's words. He was happy all the rooms were sound proofed as Sasuke's voice continued to raise in volume.

"Oh for the love of madara my sharingan was on Itachi! Okay there i said it! My sharingan was on when he did it! So now i'll never be rid of that moment Itachi. It'll never go away. Don't you see it's ingrained in my brain. Everytime I turn it on i'll be flashing back to that moment. I'll never be rid of it!" Sasuke gasped out through his hysterical sobs and gasps as the tears leaked from his eyes and down his face.

He had tried. He had tried to hope. He had thought the akatsuki would make everything better. He thought his brother could make everything all better like he used to all those years ago. He thought it would be better. He thought he would be instantaneously safe but he was wrong. What a fool he had been. No matter where he went or what he did the snake was going to come for him. There was no stopping him.

"Can't you see that it's futile? I'm a lost cause Itachi." Sasuke growled while picking up a kunai.

Sasuke sniffled."you should have just killed me with everyone else." Sasuke snapped bitterly.