Stories We Wrote Together

Chapter 13

What was I thinking, in that time right as I saw the large explosion that made everything around me glow in a yellowish light, but only a few moments later it turned into smoke. 

I was still on my knees, speechless.

What did I watch, what did I do?

What did I see, what could I do?

Millions of questions ran through my brain as I was only getting soaked in the rain. It was terrifying, I was shaking so much that when I tried to get on my legs I fell right back down, crying my eyes out, pulling my hair or even hitting the cold ground. I wanted to cry a river, why? Why is it all happening, this sickness, this torture?

My heart was beating out of my chest, I felt bursting, stabbing right in my heart, I felt like I was dying, only remembering the sweet memories .

The memories of him were appearing in my well, but broken mind, pictures, film tracks, discs, playing a laughter of him.

I attempted to stand up, and I did. As I looked at my legs they were covered in blood, my whole body soaked, I remember that I was shaking so much, even when I wanted not to move my body was just twitching on its own.

What am I going to do now, what am I going to say, how am I going go tell everyone this happened, how would they react, they would blame me

Blame me.

Its my fault.

Its my fault I fell in love with Namjoon, its my fault Jimin and Yoongi used to fight...

Its my fault I met them, them who opened my eyes, seven wonderful boys, gods of perfection, muses of love and power.

How am i going to live with this already a memory in my head, I felt my brain squeezing his words, his voice, his eyes, his smile, his existence to me.

Someone I will always cherish in my heart, a smiling sunshine, a path of hope, a light in the darkness, a rainbow that colors the gray sky.

I felt like I was choking, I felt like I couldn't talk, like it was stuck, a a curled up ball in my throat that couldn't go away, I felt my eyes filled with tears as rain drips were running down my head.

Is this sadness?

Yes.

Feeling when you know a loved one is gone.

Something that I feared.

Is this death?

Yes.

To take someone out of this world, someone so precious and pure, so gentle and soft, to a better place.

...

"Ayeon! Ayeon!" I hear my name throbbing in my ear, as I feel cold drips on my sweaty face.

I open my eyes, as I was in his arms.

"I was so worried...About you..." His voice was cracking up, his face puffy from crying, as his tears stay on my face.

I felt safe.

Safer than ever.

"Where am I...?" My brain has hurt more the second I let out my voice. I ask myself, not seeing my him completely, but the pain in my heart was arching hard as my vision was playing with me.

I open my eyes fully to see his handsome face, that was holding my head dearly.

"Who are you...?" I smile at him, wiping his tears of his face. "Are you an angel, to take me away...? Your so handsome..." He smiles, but his tears were still there.

"Its me...Your Kookie...You idiot."

Suddenly, in that moment I felt my heart hurting, as I was sweating uncontrollably hard.

"Am I dead...?" I keep asking as I held onto his shirt, not letting go.

"Don't say that..."