6. Ready

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"April, we just went out for ice cream." I try to downplay the events of my date with Tommy.

Not a lot really happened, I mean we went out for ice cream. Tommy and I joked around and just got to know each other better. Neither of us are rushing into anything, I mean I'm not even nineteen yet. Everything was just sweet and innocent, it was great.

"Not if you went out with the Tommy Lee I know, there's no way that that's all that happened." She laughs.

"Well it is." I assure her and she groans.

"Come on, crumpet! You're not in England anymore, you don't have to be prim and proper here." April pries and I roll my eyes. "I want the dirt."

"Then go to the park or something, there's no dirt on my hands." I assure her again.

"You're impossible, Queen B." She mumbles and I roll my eyes.

We walk along the strip in silence for a few minutes, we get passed and pushed by people who are trying way to get to their destinations way too fast. Everything moves fast here in Los Angeles, it's different that Redditch that's for sure.

"You said that your birthday is in April, right?" April breaks our silence.

"That's right." I agree and she smiles.

"What day? We should have a giant party." She states and my eyes grow.

"That's not going to happen, crumpet." I mock and she laughs.

"I'm serious, Bell." April says.

"So am I, I'm really not into the whole party scene." I admit.

"Tommy's going to want to have a party, you know that right?" She wonders and I laugh.

"Why does that matter?" I ask.

"Aren't you guys together? Like boyfriend and girlfriend?" April asks and I stop walking.

Tommy and I really haven't talked about our relationship status. I think we're together but I'm not sure what he thinks we are. I want to be together but....

"I don't know." I admit and she looks at me. "I really don't."

Tommy

I walk into Bella's apartment and find her in the kitchen making something at the stove. She looks over her shoulder and Bella smiles at me.

"Hey." She greets me and I kiss her forehead.

"Hey." I respond. "No rehearsal today?"

"Did it done it." Bella explains with a laugh. "The girls and I finished earlier so we went our own ways."

"So you're not meeting up with them again until the bar later tonight?" I wonder.

"I suppose not." She agrees a little confused.

"Good." I state and reach past her to turn off the stove. "Come on." I say and grab her hand.

"Why? Where are we going?" Bella asks as I pull her behind me.

"Not far." I assure her as we enter her living room.

I sit down on her couch and Bella sits down beside me. She pulls her legs up so she's sitting cross legged and she studies me with her gorgeous eyes. Bella gently chews on her bottom lip as she watches me and I smile.

"Do you not trust me or something?" I ask with a laugh.

"I never said that, you're just acting odd and its freaking me out a bit." She admits and I laugh.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you." I promise her and kiss her lips.

"Okay, fine." Bella smiles and presses her lips to mine again.

Bella

I'm sitting on my knees now beside Tommy (because of our size difference) and we're kissing, that's still innocent right? We're not doing thing wrong or that would make my father roll over in his grave.

Tommy pulls me closer to him by hips and I gasp, he laughs a little about before going back to kissing me. His hands travel down to my butt but I gasp again and pull back a little bit, I move his hands back up to my hips and his arms wrap around my hips. Tommy starts to push me backwards so I'm laying down with Tommy between my legs.

"Tommy, slow down." I mumble but he covers the words with his mouth.

He moves to kissing my neck and his hands travel down towards the front of my jeans. At this point of starting to get uncomfortable and I try to move Tommy's hands back up to my hips but he's stronger than me.

"Tommy, stop." I say again.

I keep trying to move his hands and arms but Tommy being stronger than grabs my arms and holds them above my head.

"Tommy!" I say louder than before.

"Bell--"

"Tommy, stop it." I state and he looks at me.

"Why?" He demands.

"I'm not ready." I mutter.

"Bella, come on. You know that's bullshit." Tommy states and I shake my head. "You're going to be nineteen, you're more than ready."

"That's not for you to say, Tommy." I state and push myself up. "It's my body and I know I'm not ready."

Tommy moves and sits up beside me, he doesn't look happy with my arguments. He won't look at me or anything and I narrow my eyes. I cross my arms, not in anger but in awkwardness, and I inch closer to the end of the couch. Tommy runs his hand through his hair before standing up. Tommy doesn't talk until he's at the living room door.

"Call me when you're ready to grow up, I'm not waiting anymore." He states and turns on his heels.

I hear the door close and I frown.

I thought this was real but maybe I'm not ready for this to be real. I'm not mentally ready to have sex with Tommy or anyone, I don't feel like I know Tommy well enough to sleep with him but Tommy can't wait for me. If he can't wait for me than I guess he's not right for me.

Dad always called me his little Dove and maybe that's what I actual am. I'm just a little dove in a tree, too scared to fly.

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