Denial

Chapter Twenty Four: Deep Shit

Reed

It took me forever before I finally got rid of Carter. He seemed quite intent on keeping me company throughout lunch and then even following me back to my dorm for a while. I eventually got fed up with him and kicked him out, but not before he made me promise to see each other more often, which was a lie. He couldn't be my friend anymore, not like he'd want to if he ever found out who I was dating.

Speaking of Quincy, I need to make sure he was okay. What I said earlier probably wasn't the best thing to say, but I needed to, in order to protect us both. It was the only way to make sure Carter didn't find out.

I pulled out my phone to call Quincy. I really hoped he wasn't too mad at me. I needed to be able to explain what happened. But none of it would have happened if he just stayed away like I warned him.

The phone rang for a while before clicking over to his voicemail. Frustrated, I hung up and called again. And again. Five times I tried calling. And five times he didn't answer.

Maybe he was really angry.

Instead of trying to call him a sixth time, I decided to actually show up at his apartment. He was most likely out of class by now and back there, so hopefully he'd let me talk to him.

Ten minutes later, I found myself knocking on his door. I waited for a full minute before the door slowly opened just far enough so that I could see Quincy's face.

"What do you want?" he asked me. He didn't sound like himself, but it wasn't anger in his voice. I couldn't figure out what it was.

"To talk to you," I replied, putting my hand on the door. "I never meant to hurt you."

He didn't say anything for a long while, so I asked, "Can I come in?"

Quincy thought for a moment before letting out a sigh. Taking a step back, he pulled open the door enough so that I could walk through it. Doing so, I watched as he backed up, keeping a good three feet between us.

"I don't think this will work between us, Reed," Quincy said, looking down at the ground. "It'll be better for the both of us if we're not together anymore."

I shook my head. "Why would you say that? Is it because of what I said before? I didn't mean to say it."

"Yeah? Well obviously you thought it! You d-don't love me, Reed. I can't be loved, not really. So w-why bother trying, alright?"

I closed the distance between us, wanting to take him into my arms and wipe away the single tear that was making its way down his cheek.

"Don't t-touch me," he said, taking another step back as he threw my words from earlier back at me. "Y-y-you don't d-deserve me. You n-need s-some-someone to be w-with in public, some g-girl to make you h-happy."

I've never heard him stutter this badly before, and it broke my heart, especially with the ever-growing trail of tears running down his cheeks.

"No, Quincy. I don't deserve you. I'm a fuck up, I know that. You, you're, like, perfect, in every possible way. And I shouldn't have said what I did before. I'm never going to do something like that again. If Carter or anyone else has a problem with it, then I'll punch them until they can't talk anymore, alright?"

He shook his head with a sob, the tears starting to come a bit faster. "You don't get it, Reed. I-I'm not p-perfect. Okay? I'm f-far from it."

"Why? Cause you have some baggage with your family issues? Well, guess what. I don't care about that, Quincy. We both have problems."

"No!" he shouted, looking me in the eyes. His eyes held so much pain. "I cheated. I fuckin' cheated on you and I'm a terrible person. You don't deserve m-me."