Memoirs of the Supernatural - Phase 2 [COMPLETED]

Sigil 7

Evening to you.

So you wanna know more about the Winchesters?

You came to the right place. What I figured about the boys in those 2 months I spent in the States was this: they are eccentric. And I don't mean that based only on their unusual profession but the way how they handle different situations. You want examples? Fine. I can give you one right from the top of my head.

There was a hunting emergency in Milwaukee. The boys took the job and started investigating immediately. In the meantime, Bobby and I did our thing back in South-Dakota, answering phone calls, shaking the police off, the usual business. I remember having a long day with tons of things needing to be taken care of and by the end of it I simply wanted to do nothing but crash on the couch and gawk at the telly screen. Sounds reasonable, right? But as I was surfing between stations I saw a live news report about a bank robbery and guess who was in frame as a suspected thief? Yep, our very own Dean Winchester. He was escorting a man out of the sealed off building with a shooter in his hand and after that he just casually walked back into the building.

"Bobby, you're not gonna believe this. Dean is robbing a bank and he's not very subtle about it. It's being shown live on the telly. Might I mind you it's a nationwide broadcast. Are you seeing this, Bobby?"

(🎶Lou Reed - Walk on the Wild Side)

I guess he was talking a walk on the wild side. Hardly saw any other way to explain what I was seeing.

The next day I talked to Sam on the phone and he did his best to enlighten me. They were hunting a shapeshifter which led to this whole bank robbery situation. It wasn't them who took the workers as hostage but a fellow who believed that an actual robot man with laser eyes was killing people. Yeah, that year's Doctor Who special came early.

I was worried sick. I'm sure you've figured out how easily could have the boys ended up at Her Majesty's pleasure just because of that tiny mishap. But they managed to get out without firing a single bullet by using a trick. A magician never should reveal his secret but I can tell you this: it involved SWAT uniforms.

Speaking of which what is it with Americans and guns? Some random chap walks into a governmental institution with a rifle and takes hostages like it in his morning routine. Honestly, it's unbelievable. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with the States but... Well, that's not 100% true.

You see I like to believe that I'm somewhat of a traditionalist, maybe even old-fashioned. I like being polite, I like order, I have standards in many ways and I like myself a nice cuppa tea too. Maybe not every day, sometimes I skip it during breaks at work, but most of the time and it's a delight. I don't know what's wrong with the filters in this country but tea here is rubbish compared to what we have at home. I can't brew anything properly except for the very expensive luxury teas what you can order from abroad. Quick tip: don't forget to add a bag of Sri Lankan Ceylon to your basket. The downside is that they come with a huge amount of tax money attached to the bill. Ostensibly, it's because spices, fruits and herbs are a danger to human kind, or so it seems otherwise why would you charge extra for all of those? And if I go to some place where they serve tea, for instance a café, and I want something other than lemon juice in my brew I have to ask for "cream". That I've learnt after a couple of failed attempts of ordering my drink with milk. Also, "white without" is a phrase in serious need of further explanation.

But guns and tea were not the only problems that almost forced me leave this country. It was the government actually. I got my pass by enrolling in the Visa Waiver Program which allowed me to stay no more than 30 days in the States. I looked it up, there was no way to extend my visit so I started packing because I knew that I had to leave shortly. Bobby thought that there was something wrong so he ringed the boys who came back to Sioux Falls to talk me out of traveling. How sweet, isn't it?

There was the 3 of them desperately trying to make me have a change of hearth and there was poor old me attempting to shoehorn the details of the situation into their heads. John said that this hunt for Yellow Eye can't take more than 2 months and I solved the visa issue accordingly. My pass is up and I wish to remain a law-abiding citizen as much as I possibly can. There, why is this so hard to get a grasp on? You tell me.

Truth is I really couldn't stay unless I chose to do it illegally which I couldn't afford. My life was on track, I had a great job and the police wasn't hunting me anymore. The only way I knew of on how to legally stay in the US was to become a citizen by taking an exam or to get a green card... which also involves a series of tests but never mind. None of these were an option because both takes months to prepare for and administrate even if I pass everything on the first go. And... Heh. That's not gonna happen.

Luckily for us Sam used to be a law student at Stanford before he re-joined Dean to find their dad only a year before they met me. He thought of another, quicker way: marriage.

If I were to marry a US citizen in the States than I would automatically gain citizenship myself. The catch was that we had to pretend that what we had was real. If the migration found out that my partner and I only got married for the visa they'd charge me and my significant other with fraud I believe. Sounds lovely, isn't it? Yet, it had to be done if I were to remain in America. Now the only question was who's foolish enough to marry me without taking advantage of the situation and still play along?

In that moment I had 3 options: Bobby, the man with the creepy uncle vibe dripping out of his pores. Dean, the daredevil who is about as reliable as The Royal Mail Service. And Sam. I don't have a punch-line here. Sorry, I failed you. The gents and I talked the situation through and came to a decision accordingly to the observations we've made together.

Bobby was almost instantly out of the picture. If we had to make up a scenario close to reality, he was not the way to go. Old chap Bobby is a delightful man on his own ways and it's not at all bad living and working with him. But than honestly nobody would have taken our word for it if we were to claim that him and I are one item. Not even in a church if we were to swore to the heavens. I was young, well dressed and I admit, in some cases I tend to get carried away and seem to be kind of snobbish in both taste and attitude. Whilst Bobby was neither of those. We had little in common other than our passion of learning about the supernatural. And at the age of 56 he was in good health and only owned a property with little value. Even if I was a gold digger - which I'm not - he wouldn't be a good catch. Besides since his wife died he decided not to remarry, not even for my sake. It was understandable, can't nor will blame him for it.

Moving on to the next victim: there was Dean. Our relationship came a long way in terms of getting along since we've met. I was seriously considering him as my potential groom because of various reasons. One of them was how he was longing for a family of his own. I knew this deal of his, even though he was afraid to admit it in front of me or anybody else. A pretend marriage seemed like the closest thing a guy like him could get to a real one. Then Sam pointed out a very important detail. First Dean was legally dead after a shapeshifter incident last year then he became a criminal hunted by the FBI. You know the bank story with another shapeshifter. Golly, I don't like the image I'm painting here of him... Anyhow, this idea wasn't good for any of us. We knew for a fact that some representatives from Migration will come and see if we are happily married couple and finding Bonnie and Clyde would most likely ruin the sentiment. They just don't appreciate our style, but whatever.

This left us to one candidate for the role and poor Sammy was about to put a ring on it.