That other exception

Part 33

He broke the kiss but didn't move away from me "come back to bed" he murmured, his voice low and gravelly like he'd just woken up. I wanted to stay here like this with Johnathan for as long as I could, it was safe and warm, I knew no one could hurt me here but I couldn't risk hurting him.  I shook my head and tried to push him backwards but he wasn't loosening his grip on me.

"I can't...I don't want to hurt you"

"You won't...it'll be ok" he was trying to calm me down, if I was honest it was working but he wasn't going to convince me it was ok to get back into bed and everything would be fine.  

"Jonathan..." I took a breath and tried not to let myself think about what I was about to say but the words still almost choked me "what if I rape you in my sleep"  I couldn't look at him, I didn't want to see he distaste in his eyes as he realized what I could do to him and not even wake up.

"Evan...it's only rape...if you're partner..."he cleared his throat and looked a little embarrassed "doesn't want it"

It took me a few minutes to realize what he was telling me and I couldn't quite believe it. "You don't understand..."I huffed as I gritted my teeth to try and stop myself from crying 

"and you're not listening" he grumbled as he pressed his thumb against my lips, there was a moments silence as he tilted my chin upward in an attempt to get me to look at  him, but I just closed my eyes I couldn't do it. "Evan...if the nocturnal guy want's my ass he can have it..." he pulled me into a hug and sighed before continuing "I wasn't lying when I said I'm crushing on you"

"I don't want to hurt you" I tried to keep my voice as even as possible I didn't want to give away how close to tears I was "I doubt the other me is big on foreplay" 

"actually...he's very...attentive as far as that goes" he sounded like he was struggling to get the words out, I'm pretty sure this was the first time either of us had been this intimate with a guy in a romantic way so I could empathize with him on how awkward it was.

"I was playing with you?" I was partially amazed and partially embarrassed and a little bit jealous, I mean I'd love to be able to do that to Jonathan but I'm not sure I'd have the balls to be able to make the first move and watch him slowly dissolve into what I was doing to him.

"yeah...it's how I woke up...and the reason for the boner that made you blush a little while ago" he chuckled as he slowly released me from the hug but kept me close.  I could feel my face heating up, I can't believe I had actually turned him on in my sleep or that he'd noticed me blushing.  "Come on Ev'...come back to bed" he coo'ed "Regardless of what happens I'm not going anywhere"

I felt like I was trapped, not in a horrible panicked kind of way.  He had effectively taken all of my arguments and reasons for staying awake or avoiding him and thrown them out of the window, if I still refused now I would be insulting him.  I let him slowly pull me back to bed and slowly fell asleep with his arm draped over my waist.

Memory over (( back to Delirious' POV))

"you lied to me that night" Evan accused before sighing dramatically.

"I did not" I huffed, finally getting a grip on myself

"Oh really...so telling me you'd be fine if my alter ego fucked you was the truth huh" he grumbled but there was some humor to it. I knew that if anything had have happened that night I would have more than likely freaked out, even if I was okay being around him afterward he would never trust himself again, especially around me if he ever spoke to me again.

"Oh...that..." I mumbled, we'd been together too long for him to be pissed about something that had or hadn't happened four years ago.

"Yeah that"he chuckled and kissed the side of my face "you're lucky I love you"

"extremely lucky" I mumbled as I looked down at him ran my hand over the edge of his jaw "I don't deserve you"

"You are an idiot"he chuckled and lent up and kissed me for a couple of seconds "we're perfect for each other and you know it"  I could hear in his voice that he had the biggest smile on his face and felt the last little bit of the panic begin to vanish.  I knew it would stay with me for a while but being with Evan always made it easier to cope with.  I lent down and slowly kissed him, I wanted this to last for a while and I knew he loved it when I took things slow with him, I'm not sure why he likes it so much but who cares when it makes him happy.

I felt his legs slide up mine until he was wrapped around me like an overly amorous octopus, not that I'm complaining I mean who wouldn't want to be in my position.  The problem was it was about four in the morning and Evan's body clock would wake him up in a few hours, he was one of those annoying people that woke up at seven thirty in the morning regardless of what time he went to bed, personally I'm not a morning person.  

"if you're not careful we won't get any sleep at all" I growled into his ear as his legs tightened around me and the heel of his foot pressed into my ass.

"oh yeah?...I'm not sure I believe you" he smirked  and wrapped his arms tighter around my neck.

"Evan...don't...tempt...me"I huffed trying to sound like I was warning him but I was pretty sure I just sounded turned on 

"since when did you need to be tempted" he chuckled but I could hear the smugness in his voice, he knew that he was going to get what he wanted regardless of how much I tried to resist.  He was just too much of an temptation for me to not take him up on the offer whenever or where ever he was in the mood.