AN: Guys, I've been a bad girl. Like, a really,really bad girl. (*Read in English accent with a pinch of kink to it*) You don't even wanna know what I've been doing that's kept me away so long O_O Your view of me would be completely shattered. ('Cause you all see me as an immaculate being incapable of any evil right? Of course you do...)
But nevermind that... I'm here. I'm alive. There were no charges pressed. And I didn't get deported. So that's all that matters.
Let's get on with it then! :D
Tori
I never thought silence could be so deafening.
It's been fifteen minutes since we left the school and came to the park just down the street. Fifteen minutes in which not a single word has been spoken. I know I said I wanted to talk… But as soon as I climbed into the car, it's as though everything I wanted to say, every thought in my mind, had suddenly vanished into thin air; leaving us surrounded by an immensely thick and suffocating tension.
Beck is slumped in the driver's seat, head pressed against the backrest and arms lazily hanging off to the sides as he stares blankly ahead; eyes incredibly sad and empty.
I can't help the guilt that pulls at my heart strings, constantly reminding me that I'm the one who caused this. That I'm responsible for the pain reflected in his gaze. He looks so lost and drained, so un-like Beck that it actually frightens me.
"I'm sorry." I blurt out, startling myself at how loud and out of place the words sound. He scoffs weakly and lets his eyes drop down to the steering wheel.
"You're sorry." He mutters flatly.
"I… I am." I look down at my tightly clasped hands, noticing how white my fingers look due to the lack of blood flow.
"What exactly are you sorry for, Tori?" He asks, turning his head in my direction, causing me to look back up at him.
"Well I…" What am I sorry for exactly? "I'm sorry for punching you the other night." I say looking at his swollen jaw then glancing down at my own bruised hand and flexing my fingers. "I-I shouldn't have done that. And I'm sorry I did."
"No, I was an asshole." He says with a bitter laugh. "You had every right to have punched me. I deserved it." His smile fades and he looks at me with evident anger shining in his eyes. "Why are you really sorry for, Tori?" He hisses. "Why did you follow after me today? Why did you get in the car? Why… are you… sorry?"
"Beck, I never wanted to hurt you-"
"Well you did! And you being 'sorry' doesn't doshit!" He growls. "Do you think telling me you're sorry you 'fell in love' with my girlfriend just automatically makes everything better?" He sneers, sarcastically spitting out the 'fell in love' part, making my blood boil.
"I am sorry, Beck!" I snap back. "I'm sorry this happened the way it did, I'm sorry that you're in so much pain, I'm sorry that it's come to this and I'm sorry that our friendship is probably ruined! But you need to get one thing straight," I look him right in the eye, voice low and steady. "I am not,nor will I ever be, sorry to have fallen in love with Jade."
He holds my gaze defiantly, anger and contempt flashing in his eyes as I stare back at him with equal fervor. He lets out a vicious snarl and angrily pushes the car door open; slamming it shut once he's climbed out. I quickly follow as he stomps off.
"Stop running away, Beck!" I yell after him. "We can't keep doing this forever. You want to say something? Go ahead! This is your chance! I'm right here!" He doesn't even turn to look at me, simply keeps storming away, making me even angrier. "What? You're just gonna wait 'til next time there's a party? So you can get drunk and have the balls to confront me?" That makes him stop dead in his tracks. "You need to drop the little martyr act, Beck. You've been so focused on your pain, on your suffering, on your loss, that you haven't once stopped to think of how your behavior and actions have affected everyone else! You haven't thought of how they've affected Jade!"
