My ongoing Story with Cancer

2nd Update (plus advice on how to talk with someone with cancer)

So I had my second chemo treatment today, it went pretty well. So far the only symptoms I receive is nasua (I always had that though), pins and needles pain all over my muscles, tiredness. I also feel like a doll moving around like somebody tied strings to my limbs and i have no control. My body feels like jelly and if I try to go downstairs my legs try to go out on me. I still get some night sweats, but they are not as bad, and it's mostly my face. After the effects are gone I feel a whole lot better and it's the best I've felt in months. Luckily I only have to go twice a month and I think the first time was worser than this time. Maybe because I was asleep half the time. I actually do have to go everyday for shots and blood draws to check my blood count. The nurses are so incredibly nice though. Yesterday there is a new nurse (well she wasn't new she was older, but she was new the place) she has a more tough personality, didn't look like she would get upset easily, but I was bawling because I hate needles and the antidepressant was making it worse I heard her voice waver like she was gonna cry as well. Another good this is that I get chemo in a nice comfy room full of other patients. There is this one women, I will obviously keep her identity hidden, she was really quiet til mom started talking to her and she started bawling. We told her things to help her like telling her she is not alone. Next time I see her I'll exchange numbers to keep an eye on her and check on her. This is at Ashland, Kentucky, and if you have cancer and have an option to go, go there because they will care for you so much. They made me feel better and was really easy with me. I also went to a psychologist and she diagnosed me with severe depression and anxiety, which I knew I had for a while. She is very nice and she even told me of a book I could study on since I love psychology. Now I am gonna tell you guys on what you can say to people with cancer. I know it get's awkward when you don't know what to say to them or how to treat them and that's okay especially if you don't have much experience. It can be difficult to read and understand how people are actually feeling. You smile at them and ask them how they are. The most powerful thing you can do is listen to people and make them feel like you are there for them. You hold their hand and just tell them that you have their back. It feels amazing to have someone tell you that. Always try to check on them. If they cry you let them cry because they need to let that all out. Keeping things pinned up inside you just makes you worse and worse until you break no matter how strong you are. You hug them so tight (not tight enough to hurt them) until you feel them let go because you don't know how much they need that hug. Ask them if they ever need anything or talk. Like I said before listening is such a powerful thing. Going through chemo is a thing you can only understand if you go through it. You may not be able to understand how they feel but as long as you have their back and they know it they will feel better. Now I'm gonna try to sleep. If you have any questions just ask and I will answer in here. I can keep it anonymous if you want. I will try to update every two weeks. If possible I may try every week. Sorry for this being all over the place I try to write it as it goes through my head and my mind does get jumbly. Also sorry about the bad punctuation and grammar. Bye guys have a nice weekend/week.