The pain is real

New House Big Step

We are laying in bed after two rounds of mind blowing sex. My arms are wrapped around him and my head on his chest. I can hear his heart beating. I can hear him breathing.

"Blake"

"Yeah baby girl"

"I'm pregnant"

He half sits up now to look at me. A look after fear in his eyes. I thought he would be happy I don't get it. How can a man I love and clearly loves me more that any other man I've been with, be scared to have a baby with me. Suddenly I realize he isn't scared of having a baby he is scared I'm lying. I sit up now grabbing his face in both my hands.

"Blake I'm being serious, I'm pregnant."

"Really but how?"

"Do I really need to tell u how Blake Shelton?"

"No not like that. I know HOW it happened. But I though having kids wasn't an option for us?"

"I didn't think it was. I thought I was to old to have kids"

"I'm gonna be a dad. I'm gonna be a dad! IM GONNA BE A DAD!!!!!!"

I have never seen him smile so big. It's a whole different kind of happiness. He grabs me and pulls me into a hug. We sit there holding each other not believing the blessings we are receiving. We both went through literal hell to get here, and this moment right here makes every single second of it worth it. Having a man I know loves me more than himself, three boys, a new album, a tour, and now a baby. I feel like the most blessed person ever. Blake scoots back and sits against the headboard. I scoot back beside him leaning on him, my head on his shoulder.

"Gwen?"

"Yeah cowboy?"

"You still have two shows to do before the tour is over and blinds to tape. Is that gonna be to much? Shouldn't you ya know take it easy?" He as hesitantly as though he isn't allowed to say what he is saying

"I love you cowboy."

"Your not mad I asked you that?"

"No I'm not mad! Why would I be mad?" I ask then I remember his ex, she would have gotten mad.

"Babe I'm not mad. I promise. It's nice to have someone who cares enough to ask? I will be fine Babe. This time is the most normal I'm gonna be the hole time."

We both laugh as we cuddle back down into bed. We both need sleep before we head back home tomorrow with our three boys.

"Good night sunshine. I love you."

"Good night cowboy. I love you too." I say place one last peck on his lips before drifting off to sleep.

----Blake's POV----

I'm laying in bed, my girl in my arms. How did I get here. How did I go from a marriage I was alone in, to a relationship that I couldn't be happier in all in the span of a year and a half. Just when I feel like life can't possibly get any better, she tells me we are having a baby. She fought me so hard in the beginning, saying I should be with someone who could give me the baby I want. Time and time again I told her I didn't need a baby, that what I needed was her. That was so very true but I'm so happy about this baby I can't calm myself! I have never been more blessed.
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"Are you sure your ready for this Gwen. It's a big step. I get it if your not."

"Blake I have to sell this house. It's part of the divorce agreement."

"That's not what I asked you Gwen."

"Blake, I love you. I'm having your baby, yes I'm ready. I'm ready for us to have a place that's just ours. Not a place filled with memories of my ex, heartbreak, my broken family, my failure."

I look at my feet as tears come down my face. My failure to be a good wife, to keep my husband happy, my failure to give my kids a father and mother that loves them and each other. They haven't seen their father in weeks. He took a job in an another country. How do you tell two boys that their father has walked out on them? How? My thoughts are spiraling in my head as I fall further and further in that hole.

"Gwen, Gwen, GWEN" I look up and see the sadness and love in his eyes.

"Gwen baby, please don't go down that road. There was nothing you could have done to change the way things happened. It's all on him, not you."

"I know that but it sure doesn't make it easier to accept you know."

"I know baby" he pulls me into his embrace and I melt. I fall apart on him. And he just holds me. Arms wrapped around me in a protective embrace. When he holds me the world disappears and it's just him and I.
........................
We pull up to the first house and right away I know it isn't a fit for us. The location is wrong and the house looks to modern. My last house was modern but that's not where I am anymore. I like homey, country, Blakey type homes not this modern typical LA home. We move on and pull up to the next home. It's huge but I can tell by Blake's face he already loves this house. We go inside and immediately my breath is taken away. It's the perfect mix of a ranch style house and your typical LA style house. It's like this house was made for us. It's just far enough out of the city but close enough to the boys school. Blake and I explore the house alone as the agent had to take a phone call. We walk into one room and Blake looks at me, we nboth say "King". We walk to the next and immediately know it perfect for Apollo. The next is decided to be the nursery for our new baby. The next room we see is the master, obviously Blake and I's room. I'm walking through the space when I feel his hands wrap around my waist. He flips me to face him planting his lips on mine before I even know what happening. I melt into his arms. Our bodies are flush against each other. I reach my hands to his butt and squeeze. He moans and I shove my tongue down his throat. Our tongues dance back and forth. His hands suddenly let go of my waist and I feel him go for the buttons on my pants. I grab his hands and still them.

"Blake we can't do that here! The realtor is down stairs!"

"Come on sunshine I can be quick. Besides she is still on the phone. Come on babe? Please!"

I smile and giggle as I remove my hands from him, letting him have his way. Next thing I know my jeans are being pushed down and his mouth is back devouring mine. He pins me up against the wall, his hands wondering to my breast as he messages them. My head goes back against the wall as I moan. He takes advantage as his mouth is on my neck in seconds. One hand now leaves my breasts and moves my panties aside, dipping a finger inside me. The second he does that my legs start to give out and he wraps his free hand around my waist holding me up. My hands go to his belt as I undo it and his pants pushing all of it down giving me access to his growing member. I stroke his length making sure he is ready. He pulls my underwear more to the side as he positions himself between my legs. I wrap a leg around his waist giving him better access. In one quick thrust he enters me. It takes all I have not to scream as he continues to forcefully slam into me. He lives up to his word as we both explode within seconds.

We just finish getting ourselves put back together when the realtor walks into the room. I'm blushing at what we just did, but Blake is as chill as can be. We walk and look at the rest of the rooms, including the one we decide would be perfect for Zuma. We all turn and head down stairs. We are walking behind her so I steal a kiss while she isn't looking. Blake grins from ear to ear as we get downstairs and tell her we want this house.