Some things always seem to last

Chapter 4 - My best friend

You... you don't want me? Nicky asked with disbelieve. I shook my head and tried not to cry. He got up and walked around. It's not that I don't want you. I whispered. He came to me and sat beside me. He took my hands. Then what is it, Sweety? He asked. Tears filled my eyes again. Do you have the slightest idea of what kind of hell you've put me through? I asked him. He shook his head and looked at me with guilt. When you left me, you have put me into the darkest place you can imagine. I whispered. I really had a hard time getting out of that. - I'm so sorry, Sweety. Nicky said and pulled me into his arms. I just don't want to go there ever again. I said and burried my face into his pullover. His scent was delicate as usual. I would never do that to you again. Nicky said quietly. I sighed. I can't be sure, Nico. I had never expected it back than. I answered. Nicky thought about it. So where does that lead us? He asked after a while. Can we just be friends? I answered with an unsure voice and avoided to look into his eyes. He sighed deeply and nodded finally.
So we went on as best friends again. Finally I had him back in my life. I was so happy though I missed kissing him. At least I decided for me that hugging was okay and he didn't seem to bother too.
The weeks passed and we used to text a lot when he was on the road with Westlife. His messages always made me laugh and my heart jump, but I avoided thinking of anything else than being friends. He always sent me pictures of the outside of the venues he played. Seeing his name in lights beside the others was still a sensation to him. And I have to admit it was a sensation for me too. I got messages from all over the world and places I've never been to or ever heard of.
When he was at home we've spent lots of time together. It was just like the old times, but we weren't a couple anymore. We went out to watch a movie or eat in a nice restaurant, we went to the park a lot or we just spent time at his fancy home.

Sweety, you really don't need to cook. He said, sittingpatiently on the counter of his kitchen and watching me preparing a lasagne. I know but I love too. I smiled and carried on. When the lasagne was inside of the oven we went to the sofa and watched some telly. I smiled at him and snuggled myself into his side. He looked at me and wrapped his arms around me. I heard his steady heartbeat and relaxed. That was still my favorite place to be. I wondered how I should ever fall for someone else. I looked into his eyes and saw my feelings in them. I knew that he loved me but I was still afraid of being left behind. I burried my face in his shirt quickly and pretended not noticing it. Nicky sighed and we both concentrated on the movie. I had no chance to catch up with the story I was too churned up. My heart was racing and there was a big knot inside of my stomach. After a while I felt his hand which was raising up my chin. I wanted to avoid his eyes but he wouldn't let me. How could I ever resist those eyes? Oh Sweety... he sighed. I just shook my head and escaped to the kitchen when the alarm for the lasagne saved me.