On My Doorstep [Editing]

Chapter 12

KEVIN

I paced around my room, sitting down on my bed occasionally only to get back up again. I did a few push ups, which I thought would calm me down as they usually do; no luck.

A hot cup of tea didn't do the trick either. And, it wasn't the sugar that had me going, because I hadn't eaten any the whole day.

I was bothered.

The sun had left the sky, which I'd only just noticed as my eyes went from staring at my queen-sized bed to the window. My mind had taken up a few hours of my day, the thoughts in my head keeping me from doing much after I went to the gym. I had turned on the TV and watched a few things; that's what caused all this.

I'd been flipping through some channels when I came across an interview on OWN. There she was, smiling and laughing about her childhood and describing her journey to success. She goes on and on about how being an heiress doesn't guarantee that you'll make a mark in the world. There's also a mention of how she wants to do so much more.

The fact that I even heard what she was saying surprised me, because I couldn't take my eyes off of her. And, when the cameras weren't on her, my thoughts were.

It also reminded me of our run-in the other day at Bellissimo.

I had to talk to her, to explain that Renee and I were just roommates. Just friends. Especially after I told her I was single, it would be bad for her to think otherwise. Well, not bad in general, but for me. I don't think that's the best thing.

Why are you worrying about what she thinks? She was with someone!

But, she was something. I couldn't stop thinking about her for hours after she'd come to my office. It made me feel bad most of the time, considering she was seeing me about her daughter.

I picked up my phone, annoyed with myself at my stalling and over-thinking of things. If I wanted to call her, I'd do it now.

But, what do I say?

Coffee. I'll invite her for coffee.

Before I dialled her number, I looked at the time on my phone. It was already 11:00 PM. Maybe, she'd save me my misery of being rejected if she didn't pick up.

But, if she calls back after the call's been missed...

Just call her!

I forced myself to sit down on the bed, my foot tapping on the ground in nervousness. My finger tapped the speaker button, on then off. If I put it on speaker, that would just sound weird...

My heart starting pounding as it rang for a fifth time.

She won't pick. She won't pick up.

I sighed, just about to hang up, "Oh well-"

"Hello?"

******

I don't know when I became so insecure.

Or nervous.

For some reason, the sad and lonely part of my being convinced me that Fawn wasn't going to show up.

It had only been ten minutes since I got here, and my phone was keeping me company.

Not to mention the many, many texts I've been receiving from Renee. She can't seem to understand why I'm not hanging out with her on this beautiful Sunday afternoon.

I mean, looking out of this window next to my booth, I can't fathom why so many people are inside, or driving.

It's a beautiful scene, with the water pelting the ground. It doesn't miss the many people walking around, some of them without umbrellas or jackets.

The frowns and grimaces on their faces as they wipe the water from their eyes. Tears or rain? I'm not sure. But what I do know? That's pure happiness right there.

I must be the stupid one, in my coat with my umbrella in tow. Now that I think about it, it was dumb of me to even drive here.

I should have walked.

I should have taken Renee on a nice long walk; no jackets or umbrellas. We should have walked to the park and had a nice, long picnic on the grass. Soaked sandwiches are the best!

What am I doing inside?

I love the taste of hair product and contaminated raindrops that have streamed down my cheeks and into my mouth. The comforting red shade of my face as I shiver in the atmosphere, happily awaiting the rain to freeze into snow. Or, better yet, hail!

I love the rain.

******

"So, the reason I asked you out... Um..." I knew what I was going to say to Fawn, but the thought had started escaping my mind as I looked up into her eyes.

God, she's so beautiful.

If I didn't tell her how I felt, I might lose the chance later on. I mean, she might be with someone else right now, but I can't be sure of that.

YOLO, right?

She seemed to be waiting for something to come out of my mouth. Some sort of words.

"Look... I like you a lot, Fawn," I looked into her eyes, as a smile started to appear on her face.

With a shake of my head, I went on, "I don't know where I'm going with this, but-"

"I'm interested in you too, Kevin," she looked down at the table, then intertwined our fingers.

I hadn't realized they'd been touching until she did that. My heart rate increased and I felt my face start to heat up.

She laughed, seemingly to herself.

"I find myself thinking about you at the most random times. It's not a surprise, though. I mean, you..."

I tried to hide my smile, and failed.

"I feel the same."

"Do you want to go somewhere else after this? I have until six tonight," Fawn asked, giving me that beautiful smile that made me wonder which angel threw blessings onto her face.

I smiled back, feeling somewhat relieved that she asked me first. I don't know how I would have fared with rejection from her.

"Well..."

*********

A/N

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