taste | e.d

sixteen part 2

don't forget to vote and comment ilyyyy so much :)

•••

When I wake up, I am still naked.

I almost don't expect it, but Ethan is beside me, sleeping peacefully.

He has a crease across his cheek from the pillow, and his hair is pointing in different directions, a portion of it drooping over his forehead.

I see a various red scratch marks on his back, and two hickeys just below his collarbone.

My eyes crawl down to the small of his back, to the curve of his butt. He put on another pair of underwear at some time—a pair of red Tommy Hilfiger's.

I hadn't noticed until now that he has a really nice ass.

My gaze wanders up again and I stare at his face, his features so soft. He looks younger, and really while you sleep nothing else exists, nothing bad exists. His ravaged world does not haunt him as long as his nightmares stay away.

I glance around the room and get a good look at the way it's decorated. Last night, I didn't have much time to examine, and it was too dark for me to really see, anyway.

There are two purple skateboards hanging on a wall, 4OU written on them in white text, along with two helmets sitting on top of a dresser. One is white and covered with stickers.

On another wall is an organized assortment of photos, many of which have captured beautiful sunsets, and then Ethan and Grayson. Half the photos are serious and model-worthy, with the twins' jaws clenched and ominous stares being given at the camera or something in the distance. The other half is made up of carefree candids and normal pictures of them enjoying some ice cream or life in general. I notice that Ethan's smile is very rare in these, and that in almost each one a streak of blue, purple, or pink is imprinted in his hair.

It looks a lot like a teenager's room, even with an electronic drum set peeking out from behind the half-opened closet door. There are red, blue, grey, yellow beanies along with snapbacks on top of his dresser.

I allow myself to stare at Ethan for a little bit longer, even stroking the tendrils of his hair curling outwards from the sides of his face—his "wings" is what he likes to call them—and fall asleep all over again.

•••

Unlike the first time I slept with him, Ethan is still next to me the second time I wake up, tracing shapes on my cheek with the tip of his finger. My eyelids are stubborn, closing back up every few seconds or so.

"I had a nightmare," Ethan says softly.

This time my eyes fight to remain open, although they are still heavy with sleep."Why didn't you wake me?"

"I didn't need to. Seeing you here with me was enough to calm me down," he says. His thumb circles around my eye.

He sighs. "It's Tuesday."

"What's Tuesday?" I ask stupidly.

His lip twitches, almost a grin but not quite. "Every Tuesday, Gray and I would upload a YouTube video. We had this thing where we'd come in saying 'We're back!'" He stretches out his arm above him and gives a peace sign to the ceiling.

Or maybe to Grayson.

"Dolan Twin Tuesday," he mutters, mostly to himself. His hand begins to shake, and he folds it into a fist before it flops back down beside him. "I need to take my meds."

He swings his legs over the side of the bed, his back now facing me. The marks that my nails made have faded a little more, but they're still there. I spot another hickey at his neck.

He sits still for a moment, staring off into space. I lie on my side and watch him. After about two minutes, he stands, but then he hesitates for some reason. And then he turns, puts a knee on the bed to lean closer to me and kisses me hard.

I pull back in surprise, biting my lip. His eyes widen.

"What?" I say.

"I can't kiss you or I'm going to need you." He grins shyly. Blushing. "You're sore right now. Aren't you?"

I give him a look. "No, Ethan." I roll my eyes.

He smiles at that. Even laughs a little. No, laugh isn't right. Maybe it's better described as a giggle.

After lingering beside me a little while longer, Ethan runs a hand through his hair and stands up. "I just remembered something. Wait here."

He leaves the room and shuts the door behind him. I take the chance to cocoon myself in the blanket and waddle over to his closet. The first thing I spot is a black long-sleeved shirt with Seattle written in white diagonally across the front. I slip it on, immersed in the smell of softener mixed with his own scent. The sleeves are too long and the shirt reaches halfway down my thighs, but wearing something that's his makes me feel at home. Like the moment I woke up already wearing his white T-shirt.

"Kendall Rose?" Ethan calls.

I stumble over to the kitchen, where Ethan is waiting for me, that tiny, easy grin still resting on his lips. My face heats up. I hope he doesn't notice I'm having a hard time walking.

"I, uh. Um." He rubs the back of his neck. His bravado is gone, replaced by a dorky, insecure jitteriness. "Sorry. I'm really awkward. I was thinking. We've never exactly had breakfast together. So I made pancakes." My eyes focus on the two plates in front of him, stacked with pancakes that are doused in maple syrup.

I smile at him. "I love pancakes."

He smiles back. "I had a feeling you did."

•••

This is horrible omg but it's kind of a filler chapter thing, hope you enjoyed a little idk 😭

Love y'all 💙

- yar