–––––1st joke–––––
I DON'T DRINK
- I just disinfect internal injuries
–––––2nd joke–––––
One day three men enetred a taxi. The taxi driver saw they were drunk so he started the engine then turned it off. He then said "We have arrived at your____" but was then interupted as the first man handed him money. The second guy then said "thank you. The taxi driver was then slapped by the third guy. The taxi driver, thinking #3 was drunk, asked "why?" The third man then replied, "control your speed, you nearly killed us."
–––––3rd joke–––––
If you drink too much alcohol you are an alcoholic. If you drink too much Fanta, does that make you Fantastic?
–––––4th joke–––––
-A hamburger walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Sorry, we don’t serve food in here."
-A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"
-A skeleton walks into a bar and says, "Gimme a beer, and a mop."
-A soccer ball walks into a bar. The bartender kicked him out.
-A magician walks down an alley and turns into a bar.
-A man walks into a bar. OUCH! You would have thought he would have seen it!
-A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
-A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender sets the beer down and says, “For you, no charge!”
-An Irishman walks out of a bar. Hey, it COULD happen!
–––––5th joke–––––
A father was trying to teach his young son the evils of alcohol. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived, while the one in whiskey curled up and died. "All right, son." asked the father, "what does that show you?" "Well, Dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms."
